


Hidden

by msarahv



Category: Days of Our Lives
Genre: Death Threats, Hiding, M/M, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-22
Updated: 2013-10-10
Packaged: 2017-12-24 08:13:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 19
Words: 29,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/937662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/msarahv/pseuds/msarahv
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Will is a witness and must hide for his safety. That's when he meets Sonny.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Terror and grief

  
Will was crouched in the corner of the kitchen, hidden behind brooms and mops. He was quivering with terror. And yet his conscious thought was "Thank God the kids are at their fathers'". The voices were at their highest. He had never heard Rafe being so angry. The man was always composed, expect maybe if you hurt his family. And even then, he never got to that point. "Bernardi, come on! You've betrayed all of us! I trusted you! How many years have we been partners?" The other cop's response was cold "I have a family to feed and a kid that'll go to college one day. I can't be bounded by loyalty to guys who will rat me out to our superiors. Like you!" And then, Will's ears exploded. He saw the blood enter the kitchen through the door and he knew it was Rafe. He held his breath, trying to be as silent as a corpse as no one else was supposed to be in. When Bernardi had barged in with Rafe earlier, Will was about to make himself a sandwich. But the shouting and rage had compelled him to flee. He just couldn't as the kitchen door opened only in the living-room. He wondered if he'd know when the crooked cop would have left. Maybe he wanted to cover his crime. What if he decided to wash his hands in here instead of in the bathroom? What if he spotted Will's jacket? He was wetting himself but frankly that was the least of his worries. "Mommy..." Which led to picturing Sami's face when discovering Rafe. Maybe Rafe could be saved though. He should call 911. With his cellphone. The one inside the jacket hanging on the coat rack.  
  
Will checked his watch over and over. Minutes passed very slowly. The pool of blood was widening and darkening. Soon, it would be sticky. It was strange how different reality was from books. Teen heroes were cunning and cold-headed and brave. It was difficult to be fearless when you were 17 and there was a trained gunman a room away. There were still a few noises. It might have been his heart beating but he was not sure. He chose to stay where he was, wisely as it turned out as he finally heard the door close. He knew the sound and it was the entrance. With trembling hands, he pushed the brooms away and crawled to the other side of the kitchen, unable to stand up. He had to reach the door handle without stepping in the blood and when he managed the feat, he opened cautiously. Nobody. Well apart from Rafe. Will knelt next to his stepfather, his breath caught somewhere, his eyes blurry from the tears "I'm so sorry Rafe" he whispered. The house phone was on the living-room table. He'd learned from Rafe that if you called with it, they got the address instantly. His fingers typed the wrong numbers numerous times until he heard a kind tired voice asking "911, what's your emergency?"  
  
The paramedic were fast but pessimistic. Will caught their glances after checking the pulse. Was it his fault? He should have called sooner. His mother would never forgive him. She was away for the week-end, working for his grandmother Kate. Those two hated each other but they made wonders in the business, being both hard as steel and seductive as hell. Will admired and feared them. The only one he was really comfortable with was his father Lucas. He had phoned him too and Lucas was coming as soon as he could find someone to look after Ally, Will's adorable little sister. God she would be devastated. Rafe spoiled her. He didn't have any children himself so Sami's kids were his to look after and play with. Remembering all that good time, Will was weeping as uniforms came in. His aunt Hope was looking down at the blood, sighing. She and Rafe got along really well. Everybody did. Expect for Bernardi of course and Will felt horror strike him when he heard his voice again. He couldn't help looking at him as he was joining Hope to begin investigating. A murder he just committed. It was him who turned to Will to ask "Were you the one to call 911?" Will thought as fast as he could "Yes, I did." "You found Rafe dead?" "I... I don't know, I came in and here he was, lying in the blood. I checked his pulse but I don't know CPR so I had no idea what to do. I called immediately" He saw the man relax slightly. His lie was working so far. It had to. The cops and technicians scanned the apartment. Lucas arrived and hugged his son. Will felt much better and asked him "Take me away, now..."  
  
As Lucas was opening the door, Will instinctively took his jacket. He stopped and glanced in Bernardi's direction. The glare he got answered his question. The man was putting two and two together. Will was in trouble. And he wasn't sure he would be believed.  
  
When he had explained everything to Lucas, his father took him to someone he trusted: his lawyer, Justin Kiriakis. They drove to his office and Will told his story again as he was becoming more and more agitated. The words 'witness protection' were offered and rejected. Bernardi was respected. It was his word against Will, a troubled teenager with a problem of drinking and the disadvantage of having just came out and be looked down by a part of Salem's population. Plus it would mean no contact with the family and Lucas pointed out that not only it would be hard on Will and him but Sami wouldn't hear of it and in her efforts to find Will would surely expose his whereabouts "Then, he must hide in a place only the fewest know." said Justin "At least for the time being. His safety comes first. If Bernardi is cold-hearted enough to shoot his partner, he won't hesitate to kill Will when he has the chance. Will must leave immediately." The son and father exchanged a desperate look. Will felt he was sliding down a never-ending crevasse and his nails were slipping on the smooth surface. He was about to throw up. He uttered "Can you help me? Do you have a place for me?" Justin looked at him with compassion. He stayed silent for a while. Then he said "What I'm about to tell you will put all of us in great danger. Someone I love more than myself is also in danger and had to hide. You can join him. But you must promise to me absolute caution and you, Lucas, you must not tell anyone except those you deem worthy of your trust." Lucas nodded gravely. Will looked down. His heart was breaking.  
  
An hour later, he was lying in Justin's trunk, under a blanket, trying to sleep as he'd been told it would be a very long trip. His father was talking with Justin but he could hardly hear them. He made out "Adrienne... worried to death... Nick... a month... what you're feeling...". He hadn't seen his mother or his siblings again and he had no idea when he would. After an hour, they got to an airport and he hugged Lucas and Justin good-bye, crying his eyes out. The small plane belonged to a fishing enthusiast who owed Justin a favor. Will looked through the plane's window, thankful that it was dark. He'd never board a plane and any height made his skin crawl. He sat in the back, muttering and praying he didn't really know who to. The pilot landed and handed Will to an old man wearing a baseball cap. They took his jeep through the forest. It was a silent drive and Will liked that better. He didn't trust his voice not to quaver. They reached an opening and when the engine stopped, Will heard the sound of soft waves. A lake, maybe? He took his small bag and walked on the path to the left. After half a mile under the mere light of the moon and stars, he found the little cabin. He scraped on the door and took out his key. He shivered when he came in, at the contrast with the glacial night and the coziness of a wooden fire. On an armchair, he saw a dark figure. "Hi" Will croaked "You must be Sonny."


	2. Guilt

Will could hardly make out the stranger's traits. There were no lights on and Will wasn't sure there were any lamps. Or electricity for that matter. Justin had explained it was a fishing place, a thing so inconsequential it wasn't on any map nor registered in any town registry. Sonny had been there for five weeks and hadn't seen anyone except for the person delivering the groceries. Was there a fridge in there? The plainness of that thought surprised Will. Was he already healing? Well not really, a fresh wave of guilt came splashing his heart. He decided to escape the feeling by speaking up "I'm Will. Will Horton. Your father sent me..." A metallic gleam caught his eyes. It was a good thing Justin had warned him Sonny had a gun because even then Will felt like fainting. He could still hear and feel the shattering that came with the shooting. He quickly dug through his bag to fish the envelope Sonny's dad had given him "I was told to give you that." No answer. But the gun-less hand took the letter.  
  
 While the other was reading, Will put his bag down and tried to relax and recharge a little through the heat of the fire. He was beginning to feel better when he heard "Is he dead?" and a pang in his chest prevented him from answering. So he just nodded. "Wow, I'm so sorry. When did it happen?" Will let out a sob so that his voice could escape "This morning." Sonny didn't move and the rational part still vaguely functioning in Will's brain was aware that the guy surely doubted him a lot. He remembered he'd been cloistered in here for over a month and he must have lost a few social skills. Will don't think he could have. He was very relieved somebody his own age was there. The weight of loneliness was appearing already. But Will refused to feel sorry for himself. Rafe was dead. His loved one suffered and missed him. And they must miss Will too now. He was so focused on these sad facts, he barely noticed he was whimpering. He felt a prudent hand on his shoulder. "Come on, I'll show you the bed." Will took his bag and looked as Sonny opened a door. There was a bedroom in there. With a bed. One bed. And no couch anywhere. It was a wide bed too and it looked worn but comfy. Will turned, staring at Sonny in disbelief. The young man smirked "Don't worry, I don't snore." Will stammered "Well, it's.. I'm... You...". He stopped and thought things over. Better warn Sonny now. Maybe they could create a semblance of mattress for Will near the fire. He spoke again, as quietly as he could "The thing is, Sonny, you might be very uncomfortable sleeping in the same bed as me. 'Cause, you see I'm..." He lowered his voice a little more "...gay." he closed his eyes. He had gotten used to the reaction this got. Most of his friends had turned their backs on him. The remaining ones were the greatest and in a way, it had been a good filter. But now Sonny would be his only company and being despised was not in his priority. The total silence that had followed his declaration could mean anything, though, so he had to look again. Sonny seemed calm. Half his face was hidden in the dark but he was most certainly not freaking out. "Well" He said in a weary tone "At least we have that in common. If you're not the kind to try things during the night, I won't have to bludgeon you with this and we might get along fine. Unless you snore?" Will eyed the baseball bat near the night table. "Will you use it if I say yes?" "Absolutely. I need my sleep." The attempt at humor seemed a little forced but Will didn't blame him. He was exhausted and aching. Hard to know if he would sleep but at least he would lie down. And the proximity of another body would certainly help against the invading feeling of abandon in this wilderness. "Then, I don't. Do you mind if I lie down now?" He felt the shrug more than he saw it. It was enough encouragement and he took out his warm night-clothes from the bag. "Is there a bathroom?" "This door. You can't take a shower though, the water is chilly." Will paused "How do you manage then?" "A wash glove. You can borrow a clean one if you want." Will entered the bathroom, dismayed but it was actually a nice room. An oil lamp was shining and there was a big mirror in which Will encountered his own cadaver-looking face. He didn't stay long and when he was back, Sonny was already in the bed, yawning. This was the first time Will had been in a bed with a guy in it and somehow he had never pictured it that way. He was careful of keeping his body alignment in a straight line, not to accidentally brush the other man. As soon as the heavy covers fell on him, he drifted into an unruly sleep.  
  
The nature always woke up before Will did and it took a while for the soft noise to be loud enough to stir him of his nightmares. He had spent the night wishing he could wake up and when he did, wishing he could actually rest. The daylight was creeping through the curtains and yet Will didn't feel like moving. He remained lying down, waiting for hunger or bathroom needs to give him the energy to get up. After a while he smelled coffee. Sonny wasn't in the bed and Will wondered if he had snored or not. How can you know if you do when you sleep alone? He kept entertaining these superficial considerations to keep the horror at bay. Another smell caressed his nostrils. Toasts. He rolled over and looked at his bag. Should he change? Would Sonny mind if he showed up in his pajamas? He didn't risk it and chose a pair of jeans and a sweater. He added a jacket. He doubted the fire would be made in the morning. He walked in the main room which was empty. The smell came from outside and he walked around the cabin to a wooden table and two large chairs. They all seemed like they had been carved from a tree trunk and Will wondered who did this house belong to. Sonny's family? A friend's? Sonny was turning his back at him and all Will could see was a blue flannel shirt and dark jeans. It was a nice view and he wondered if the rest would be as pleasant. He had barely seen Sonny's face the night before and he was curious. Then he smiled when he remembered how he must look. Messy hair, dark circles under the eyes, fear and guilt cramping his muscles. Yeah, a real Adonis! "Hey, Sonny, good-morning." Sonny jumped and turned around, on his guards. He relaxed instantly and Will thought he heard something about breakfast and jam but all he could focus on was how well-built the guy was. He had dark thick hair and warm brown eyes. He looked a lot like Justin and had the same kind expression but in a more juvenile and energetic way. Will smiled tentatively and was rewarded by a heart-stopping grin. Sonny sat and gestured at the second coffee mug. "Thanks. I'm afraid I'll be a little out of the loop today. I don't mean to be lazy but..." Another smile "It's OK, I get it. You've been shaken up. When you're done, I'll give you the tour." "A small one I guess..." Sonny shrugged "The house is small but the nature is beautiful, thankfully. If you like to read, there are a few things... You play chess?" "A little." Sonny got up. "Take your time. There's nothing much to do so I've learned to appreciate everything." Will took a sip. The coffee was all right. Powder maybe? Well, he reminded himself, no electricity, so... and then it was back. The feelings he was trying to repress came all at once, leaving him a mess. He wanted to erase all what had happened. Be back to his other old problems. He would welcome them now, even the homophobic insults. He could stomach them much better than losing someone he admired and loved. And he wanted his mom. He knew he was a grown man and all but he didn't care. He wondered if Sami was going to contact him. She might blame him for not helping and saving her husband. Will felt like a failure. He put down his buttered toast and wept. A hand landed on his and a voice whispered "You'll get trough it. I'm sure of it. It's going to be all right."


	3. Sadness

Will felt like a zombie. Not the kind that ate brains, the kind that were dead bodies still walking. And another fun memory was spoiled by the flashbacks. He didn't think he could ever watch another horror movie ever. Well neither could Rafe... Sonny nudged him softly. "It's an ice box of sort. The nights are chilly so it helps. Whenever I get the ice packs, I stuff them in here and I eat the food as fast as I can. After two days, I switch to canned food. I hope you like tuna." Will didn't but he stayed mute. Sonny was well organized. And cautious at all time. The gun was never far from him and that made Will slightly easier. He hoped Sonny knew how to use it, though. The young man was back to being distant after the nice comforting moment at breakfast. It was so unreal to behave around a stranger you were tied to. At least he didn't seem to mind that Will wasn't talking much. At times the depression engulfed him. At others, he managed to be in the present and marvel at the calm rosy waters or the beautiful chessboard. This one came from Sonny's uncle, apparently. Will took one of the pawns and rolled it between his fingers. The wood had darker streaks and felt all soft. Will was a pawn too, now in the great game of grown-ups.  
  
He sat on the shore. It was a small lake for Will who was used to the Michigan. But still big enough for boats and yet there was no deck around. Why a fishing hut then? He asked Sonny later "There was one when I came in. It was rotten and in need of repair. I took it down. There's no boat and I don't want to bring attention. The cabin is hidden by the trees from certain angles and I've put some vegetation on the roof too. Broken branches and stuff." Will nodded "Do you get mail? Or is it too dangerous?" "Sometimes. It comes with the food. I don't keep the letter long, though. It puts me down after rereading them too much. I have a radio too. With batteries. They last longer than I'd had thought. My MP3 player is down." Will frowned "I think mine is in my bag. It might last a little. You want to share it?" Sonny's eyes sparkled "Only if you listen to good music." Will went to the bedroom and sat on the bed. He felt weary. It wasn't even noon and he couldn't walk anymore. The adrenaline mush have wreaked his system. Sonny appeared in the doorway and looked at him. "I guess we can listen here, we'll be comfortable."  
  
"That's a great group. Never heard about them." "I saw them in concert once in Chicago..." Will stopped. Then he spoke again. At least he would share it. "My stepdad offered me the tickets for my 16th birthday. He said it was from him and Mom. But she winked and said it was all him. He even took me there with my friend because he thought we needed to be protected and he was good at it..." Will choked on his sobs. He cried convulsively for a minute. When he began bawling hysterically, He felt his back being clumsily rubbed which helped him breathe a little. The yelling stopped and he realized Sonny had switched off the player. Well, no wonder, they couldn't hear it anymore anyway. "You've lived with him for long?" "A few years. When he married my mom, I was so happy. He was such a caring guy. He loved us very much. He bought that big apartment so that we would have each our own room. He didn't earn that much as a cop but he gave and gave... Then Mom got this job with a great pay but lots of extra-hours and he supported her. He said she needed to have her own career..." "You miss him a lot?" Will shook his head. He felt the hand on his back stiffen and tried to explain as well as he could "I can't accept that he's gone yet. I keep thinking I was wrong or I dreamt it and he's gonna come out of the hospital or something. I know it's stupid because the feel of his pulse-less wrist is as real to me as the feel of this pillow." "It's not stupid..." It was a murmur. So low he barely heard it and yet it filled him entirely. He began crying again. He didn't really stop for the whole day.  
  
Sonny had gone out for a few minutes. Will figured he was getting tired of his sobs. He couldn't stop them and had stopped trying as it tired him even more. He hadn't told Sonny why he was crying. There was Rafe. There were his parents. His little sisters, so sweet and annoying at times, always wanting to play dolls. His brother Johnny, the only boy in the family now and as Will knew him, he'd certainly take his role very seriously. He was just a baby in Will's eyes though and Will hoped like hell EJ, Johnny's father would help him instead of focusing on his work. The man was obsessed with Sami. Was he going to take advantage of the situation? He saw his mom getting married again, wearing a black wedding dress and a veil. EJ held her hand, looking smug. Will was hiding behind the best men, looking at the assembly. Suddenly he saw Rafe stand up. His skin was green and he had straws in his hair. He shouted "Sami, no! I still love you!" with a cold horrifying voice. Will screamed. He opened his eyes to a concerned Sonny "I didn't feel like waking you, so I already ate dinner. You want to talk or to be alone?" Will stumbled on his words "Rafe is dead. He can't come back. I couldn't do anything. I let him die." Sonny got up and turned to the stove saying "You survived, Will. You could have died too. And I'm not sure your mother could have endured that. When I was attacked the first time, my mom spent three hours holding me. She couldn't let go." The first time? Will knew Sonny was fleeing someone dead sent on killing him but he had no idea he'd already been assaulted. "When I left she cried all the time. My dad tried to spare me but my cousin wrote it to me. She was worried. You know her maybe, she lives in Salem. Her name is Abigail Deveraux." The shock took Will out of his stunned state "Are we related? She's my cousin too." "Really? On which side?" "My dad and Jen are half-brother and sister." Sonny came back with a plate "my mom's Jack's sister, so, no, we aren't relations. It's a pity though, I wouldn't mind finding new family members." Will looked at the plate and managed a pitiful smile "Well maybe we could be friends. I wouldn't mind that." Sonny gave him a contemplative stare "I don't know. No offense but I don't feel very social at the moment. I guess we'll get along and that's already a lot. You can count on me and I hope I can count on you..." The last words sounded doubtful. Will stopped before answering and reflected. He was damaged, unable to function properly. But he could give a few assurances "I won't betray you, that's for sure and I'll help you with the chores, just not today." Sonny nodded and went to the bedroom. When Will joined him later, he was already sleeping. Will felt alone. His hand kept going to his jeans, searching an absent cellphone. He sighed and stepped out to breathe fresh air but the second he stepped out, he felt exposed. He knew it was silly, he had walked out in the day but with the dark, shapes turned into frightening silhouettes, ready to pounce at him. He ran in and bolted the door. He went to the main door and checked it too. Then he prepared for bed and sat for half the night, trembling. At one point, Sonny rolled in his sleep and bumped his hand in his. His fingers instinctively wrapped around Will's wrist and the touch got the better of his anxiety. He finally closed his eyes.


	4. Acceptance

It had been three days since Will had arrived and he was still hurting. He didn't rest enough and had guiltily waited the night before for Sonny to be fast asleep to recreate the peacefulness he'd felt by touching his hand. It had worked but now it was barely dawn and he was wide awake. Well, he could prepare breakfast. He was helping Sonny now. Mainly in finding dead wood and bringing it to the woodshed. Sonny was intent on stocking enough for the cold times ahead. That's when it hit Will. Christmas was in a month. Would he still be confined in here? Would his only company be that nice but broken man who was looking at him as if he was a fragile baby bird at times and as a piece of furniture at others? He didn't feel like judging him and wondered if this attitude stemmed from the forced isolation or from the constant fear or from what had occurred before. He didn't dare ask. He was occupied with his own feelings of guilt and remorse, trying to escape them or deal with them but they were still stronger than him. He looked at Sonny, whose face looked angelic as he slept and tiptoed to the kitchenette. He rummaged through the cupboard but only found ground coffee. Next to it was sitting what looked like an elongated teapot with a plunger attached to the lid."It's a french press." Will jumped. Sonny had been completely silent. He took a spoon and showed Will how to brew the coffee then press to the bottom after a few minutes. Meanwhile, Will prepared some toasts and found a cereal box "You eat these sometimes?" "When I get the milk. So that's tomorrow!" He smiled as he did once in a while and Will felt a pang of pity to see him so excited for something so trivial. Then he remembered he was in the same situation and he should feel pity for himself then.  
  
His MP3 player died that day. They were lying on the bed, Sonny reading a book with a glacier on the cover and Will grieving. The sound got awful then stopped. Sonny turned and smiled "Time to go back to the old radio." "How old is it?" Sonny shrugged "Old enough to be sturdy and reliable. I listen to local news every two days to feel connected to this place. Apparently there's not much going on what with the winter coming." "So, no regrets." "Mmmm." "Sonny, can I ask you something personal?" Sonny frowned but didn't seem adverse "Sure..." "Do you miss your mom?" The look he got from this made Will feel even more childish. He was about to wave his question away when Sonny laid on the mattress and replied "Horribly. I miss my dad too but my mom was the one who cuddled with me when I woke up with a nightmare when I was little..." Will's childhood was more complicated but Sami was still his mother. He lay down next to Sonny and asked, his voice shaking "You think mine will forgive me?" "For what?" Sonny's voice was soothing in the extreme. He didn't even seem to make an effort. "For not calling earlier, for not barging in and getting killed at his place..." Sonny sat on his elbows "What's wrong with you?" Will flinched at the harsh tone. He shook his head "You don't get it. I hid like a little kid. I'm 17. I should behave like a man. I should have been braver." Sonny laughed. It was not a mocking laugh really, more like a surprised one. "I don't know if I should scold you or admire you. This is the real world, Will. You don't stand up to psychopaths. You call the police on their ass." Will sighed "Unless they're the police..."  
  
Will didn't touch Sonny's hand that night. He didn't want to be creepy. If he wanted to be more grown-up, he could start here and face his demons. He ached silently, the seconds slowing down and the absolute silence being an open area for his memories to play. The shouts. The mind-shattering gun shoot. The beating of his heart as Rafe's one was stopping. No he wasn't going to cry. He was going to learn to live with this guilt eating his heart. He could do this. He clutched the edge of the night table until his articulations hurt. Little by little, the night crept away. Will held on.  
  
When he went in the bathroom to shave, Will took time to check under his eyes. At the rate the dark was growing, it would reach his eyes soon. He needed to sleep. The razor fell from his hand and the blade grazed his leg. "F...!" "Are you OK in there?" "Yeah, I cut myself shaving!" "Be careful! Don't damage this exquisite baby face of yours!" This was not something to say to someone who was kneeling down with a blade in his hand. After mending the two wounds, Will felt a little grateful at Sonny for trying and make him feel better. He knew he looked like sh... and decided to take some time to pamper up. After all he was rich in time.  
  
Sonny was going out. He looked impatiently at Will. "So, you're coming?" "Where?" "Get the groceries!". Oh right. Will's stomach agreed with the idea and he stepped out. Sonny was walking fast and Will had to jog to reach him. They walked for half an hour and Will looked everywhere for the traces of a path. Sonny didn't need any and advanced with purpose. Will stopped. There was a man with his back to them, near a car, smoking. He hid behind a tree until Sonny gave him the all-clear "It's OK, it's Martin." "Who's Martin?" "Our only contact to the world... Hey Martin, what happened to your cap?" The old man turned and Will felt the relief of recognizing him as his chauffeur from a few days ago. "My grandson stole it for his baseball match." "Really, how old is he?" "Twelve. His arm is very good. He's a great pitcher!" The man went on and Will wondered at the change in Sonny. He took one of the heavy bags and shook hands "I'm sorry about your dad, that's horrible. My nephew's a cop in Seattle too and we always worry he'll get shot one day." Will pinched his lower lip and nodded. He didn't feel like correcting him, in fact he felt quite shy. He wondered what was so wrong with him that Sonny would be so interested in that man's life but not in him.  
  
Sonny opened the bags and quickly put everything away. He had given the warm ice pack to their deliverer and gotten fresh one, literally. "Time to dig in that cereal box, hey Will!" He took a green box and put it on the armchair. Will drank the milk, appreciating the taste and coolness. He was already tiring of canned food. There were fresh fruits, vegetables and dairies. Sonny had to focus on rearranging the ice box as he explained that Will's presence meant more room-taking food. Chuckling. Will finished eating and saw Sonny open the small box. Inside there were envelops. Lots of them. There weren't addressed to them or to a Martin. Yet, Sonny was opening each one and making two piles on the floor. He handed the biggest one to Will. "These are for you. They're from your family." Will looked at the first letter and paled "Oh my god! Gabi!" Sonny looked up from the letter he was reading "Who's Gabi?" "Rafe's little sister and my ex." "Your beard?" Will shook his head "No, it was before... I forgot all about her. She must be devastated. She loved Rafe so much!" Sonny looked thoughtful "Well you can write her back so she'll feel a little better." "I can?" The possibility made his heart sing. It felt there was a narrow shining path appearing between him and those he loved. "Sure, we send the letter to another address and they get them eventually. It's complicated. Be sure not to give her any clues about this place, though" he added severely. "If you do, you're putting us in jeopardy. So nothing at all, even the lake is too much." Will nodded and took a serious look. "I'll go in my room to let you read in peace all right?" "Mmmm"  
  
Will looked at all the names at the bottoms and puts the one with "Sami" on it away. He read the one from his dad, from Abby, Gabi, and they all were filled with love and support. He felt much better. He looked at the disregarded paper. Should he ruin this blissful feeling? He could put it away or even burn it. He got up and walked back to the living-room where the fire was sending yellow and red reflections on the walls. His eyes wandered the letter and what he saw made his stop his movement " _Will, my William, my little boy,_ "  
  
" _I miss you so much but I'm so glad you're safe. I trust Justin, he's a great man and I'm sure his son is exactly like him so you are in good hands. It is very hard for all of us here. Your brother and sisters are asking for you constantly. They must think you're dead. I'm so so grateful you're not. That bastard cop came to talk to me yesterday. I wanted to claw his eyes out but I remained civil and nice just for you, my baby. You would have been proud of your mama and her self-control! I want you to be safe, Will. Be careful all the time. Remember when I warned you against talking to strangers? Oh Will, I can hardly sleep thinking about you on your own. Justin says I must not know where you are but this is hard._  
  
 _We're burying Rafe in two days. The coroner told me the bullet went straight to the heart so he was killed instantly, he didn't suffer. I wish I had been there, maybe all of that wouldn't have happened, I don't know._  
  
 _I love you Will, take care of yourself my sweet precious baby. I send you all my love_  
  
 _Sami_ "  
  
He had no tears left. But all his muscles gave way. He fell on the floor and hit his head. When he opened his eyes again, Sonny was kneeling beside him looking very shaken. Will exclaimed, to Sonny and the world "I didn't let him die! It wasn't my fault. I couldn't have done anything. My mom doesn't hate me!" There was a tear on Sonny's cheeks "I'm so sorry Will." "For what?" Will asked as he walked to the armchair and sank there "For forgetting you and making you feel unwelcomed." Will grinned "No, you didn't, you've listened to me, you've been kind." Sonny sat at the table and answered, his hand rummaging his hair "That wasn't enough. You're here and we've barely had any discussion. You're in pain and I'm not helping you." Will continued smiling, a little forcefully "You don't have to, you have your own problems to deal with. Don't worry." Sonny sighed and went out.  
  
Sonny looked guilty all day long and talked even less. Will was at loss. A big clawed burden had been ripped of his heart and now he could accept Rafe's passing and remember the good times. It was still hard but at least he didn't hate himself now. When the light faded, he went to bed and saw Sonny already under the covers with an intent expression on his face. Will lay down and felt fingers circle his hand. "You could have asked you know, I wouldn't have used the bat for that... Actually, I like the feeling too. I missed it yesterday. It's relaxing." Will slept like a baby that night. The next day, he went to the mirrors and stared in disbelief : there weren't dark shadows anymore under his eyes.


	5. Sonny

Will prepared lunch and actually enjoyed himself. He had cooked many times for his siblings when he was watching them and focusing on it was a nice distraction. He had to be careful with the stove. It had to be packed with wood and you couldn't tame the heat. He had to measure a lot too, not to waste their fresh vegetables. Sonny came back from the forest and stopped at the door "God, this smells good. Are you Martha Stuart?" Will grinned "Wait till you taste it. I spent five minutes looking for pepper." Sonny leaned on the doorway to remark "You look better." Will shrugged "A little, yes, thanks. The nightmares have stopped at last." "Mine don't." Will looked up frowning. Sonny never stirred at night and seemed collected if overly prudent. Will chose not to answer and sat, putting the pot between them. Sonny liked the food. But he looked sad.  
  
It was getting colder and colder. Will came carrying wood for the fire and saw Sonny had set the chessboard on the table. He came nearer. The pieces were already advancing and he asked "You're playing on your own?" Sonny gave a start "I was trying to better myself. You want to play?" Will nodded and they started. "I wouldn't have pegged you as a chess player. You seem more like an active type." Sonny smiled and replied "I am. This is a replacement to partying." "Not as good?" "Not really. I went to South by Southwest in Austen this last March and it was amazing. You've already attended it?" Will shook his head. "You drove there?" "With friends. I met someone there too. He had heard about Salem, and when I mentioned I had family there and planned to visit, we bounded." Will couldn't help asking "You dated?" Sonny looked at the board and pushed a knight along its crooked path. "It wasn't serious. But the sex was good. And he was fun company. You know?" Will didn't. At all. Gabby was his last relationship and even though he'd accepted his sexual orientation, he hadn't acted on it yet. He waited for Sonny to talk again, moving his own pieces randomly, cautious not to break the spell. "... Then his best friend joined us and he came out to him. The guy didn't take it well. They fought. And Andrew got hurt. His head hit a concrete angle and he never got up..." Will caught his breath "He's dead?" He put his hand forward to press Sonny's but Sonny answered "No... He's in a coma." So that why Will's fall had shocked him so much. "His friend blamed me. He said it was my fault, that I had turned him, that I was going to pay. I contacted my dad and we filed a complaint for the threats. My parents came to see me and that's when it happened..." Will acted on his impulse. Sonny's hand was trembling and so was his. "He had his knife against my throat. I couldn't move. I was thinking 'I'm gonna die, I have so much to experience yet and it's already the end.' I tried to fight but he had a grip of steel. He was half-insane. The police arrived just in time. After that they put me under surveillance. And then he tried again. With a gun this time. He shot at me from the first floor of an empty building. It was a matter of inches. My father had had enough. He said that the police was useless against him. And that if we went to Salem, he'd follow us. He began putting up a plan and we traveled to a few city for him to lose our tracks. One day I saw him. He was six feet away in the crowd. He waved at me. That night I traveled here. When I saw you, though, I thought he sent you..." Will smiled and replied "Well I don't even know the guy, so..." Sonny looked up and his eyes looked empty. It was all Will could do not to get up and flee. "You do. You're a Horton. His name is Nick Fallon. He's your cousin."  
  
Will did get up. He walked very slowly and began hugging Sonny. He felt his body shrink in a feeble way and held on until Sonny put his arms around Will's back. They stayed that way till it was too dark and Will remembered he hadn't light the fire. He did and they went back to the board. The game was silent but the tension Will had felt before was gone. They went to bed and Will took an extra pullover. He was still cold. Sonny got up and opened the high narrow cupboard and extracted a thick blanket. He tucked up Will and smiled "You look like a little child like that." Will chuckled and then sighed "I wish I still was. It wasn't always good, far from it, but it was easier. I was more innocent, I guess." Sonny slid under the cover and answered "I couldn't wait to be grown up and travel and do what I want." "Where did you go?" Sonny put his head on his elbow and tilted it "Everywhere. To Australia and the Sahara and the Jungle... You know, in the Himalayas, there's this mountain called K2. It's very high and dangerous." "And you climbed it?" "Mmmm" Will gaped. He was afraid on a high ladder. "Is that why you're reading that book with climbers on it?" Sonny laughed "Frison-Roche? Yeah, he was a french alpinist. He's one of my heroes... It was lonely and harsh up there too, you know. But I wasn't afraid, I believed in my capacities. My friends said I was cocky. They should see me now..." Will felt more daring in the dark and whispered "You are still strong. I don't know if anyone else would have refrained from going insane and depressed after all these weeks." Sonny sighed "Well I haven't. But it was hard. Sometimes I thought I heard voices. And it was a bird or the wind." "And the nightmares?" "He's in it, always. Threatening my family, killing my mother, carving my heart... It varies." "I had no idea. You never scream or jolt." "Neither do you."  
  
The rest of the week, they talked. About everything. Their favorite film, the book that they found the most boring. Their past relationships. Sonny looked a little shocked when he realized Will was a virgin. He toned down his way of talking afterward. Will teased him and said he wasn't that innocent. He knew how it worked. Sonny had laughed and went back to his cooking. They were back on the canned food and Will began counting the day to the groceries delivery. He rationalized it by thinking it meant the letters would come in too but he was actually craving for cereals and milk.  
  
"What are you listening to?" "A baseball match." "Are you kidding. You should have called me!" Sonny looked at Will with a surprised air "You like baseball? Which team?" Will gave him a defying look "The Cubs." Sonny grinned "They're playing now. But I'm afraid they're loosing." "Well" said Will all excited "They can still change that." They listened passionately, ears pressed to the rusty device, shouting and crossing fingers. The Cubs didn't win. But from now on, Will and Sonny stopped being strangers. When one woke up in the middle of the night, he poked the other one and described the whole dream in detail. It made it possible to go back to sleep and when it didn't work, they talked some more. Of Sonny's travels mostly. Will felt a little boring compared to him but he liked listening and Sonny seemed to like the attention.


	6. Amazed

Will smiled and put his bowl of cereal back on the table. Although it was freezing, they still ate breakfast outside. It felt good to be out of the house. And the lake always had new surprises in terms of colors and sky reflections. Sometimes it was frozen and all shiny. The trees had lost their last red leaves and Sonny had worked harder at camouflaging the cabin. Will was always in admiration of his endless energy. He helped as much as he could but also relaxed and learned to observe the small changes in the landscape or to differentiate the sounds all the birds made. He didn't know their name but he knew how they looked and when they came flying over the waters. Some had left for warmer weather and Will thought about their trip to Florida or Mexico, envious of their freedom. There was one little robin hoping next to him that morning. He knew that one, with the red neck and the beautiful songs. But a hush from the bushes made it fly away in haste. Will looked behind and his heart melted. There was a scrawny little cat, with white and brown fur. He looked at him pleadingly. Will ate the last cereals, poured the remaining of the carton and put the bowl down. The kitty lapped avidly "Will, this was our last milk!" Will looked up and copied the cat's expression. "Look how skinny it is. You think it comes from a house in the neighborhood?" Sonny shook his head "There ain't no neighbors. The next town is hundreds of miles away. His masters must have abandoned it by the road... Martin says he has a three-hour drive to get here." "Three hours?" exclaimed Will startled "I didn't realize that. The drive didn't seem that long." Sonny sat opposite Will and absent-mindlessly scratched the cat's neck "That's because you came from the aerodrome. It's nearer. It's in the middle of nowhere." "What is it for then?" "Tourism, I guess..." "But you've never seen anyone, have you?" "No. Come on, Will, what are you giving him now?" Will had taken the fat from the ham he'd just finished. The cat looked at him adoringly "You know we can't keep it, right?" The feline jumped on Will's lap and purred. Will was a goner "Why not? It won't eat much. It's better than let it die in the wilderness..." "It could manage." "But it will be company. Someone to love, you know. I miss that so much." He added as his hand was pushed aside by the cat bumping his head repeatedly. Sonny got up and went inside grumbling "You're lucky you're cute." "Isn't he?" replied Will petting his new friend. It was like him, lost in the wilderness, alone and hopeful. Sonny turned and opened his mouth then closed it. Will heard him chuckle as he began washing the dishes.  
  
Two days later, the cat woke Will up by walking on his stomach, sniffing the air in a surprised manner. The air had indeed a crisp smell and Will jumped out of bed and ran to the door. It hadn't snowed heavily but enough that there was only white all around. Sonny joined him, carrying Berry. It hadn't taken long for him to fall head over heels with the stray. They had argued about the name but Will had won with Huckleberry Fin. Sonny had raised an eyebrow "Mark Twain?" And as it was a mouthful, the cat became a fruit.  
  
They stayed there a while, taking in the wonder. There was no noise, no traces anywhere. Their breath made smoke-like little clouds. The cat leaped from Sonny's embrace and landed on the soft wet new thing. It looked disarticulated for a moment then began running. Will felt the need too. They never ran. Sonny was adamant. "May I remind you we are in mortal danger, the both of us? We are exercising plenty what with carrying the wood all the time." Well, there wouldn't be no carrying today. They dressed warmly and strolled as far as they dared. Will wished he had a camera. Maybe he could draw? He asked Sonny who went and retrieve the paper they used for the letter. During the day, it snowed again and Will had to hurry to finish. He put the finished product on the mantlepiece and suggested a chess tournament for the duration of the snowing. "What does the winner get?" Will mulled it over "The loser washes the dishes for the two next... days?" Sometimes it hurt to talk in terms of weeks. It meant they would still be there. Trapped. But Will didn't want to spoil the mood and went and place the board on the rug near the fireplace. The flames caressed his left side and Berry fell asleep on in right leg so he was good.  
  
Sonny was distracted at first and lost the first two games. He kept looking outside, worrying. Will didn't. What if they couldn't go out for a few days? What change did it really make? As long as they could get to the woodshed. In fact there was a trapdoor over it, opening in the bedroom so they were fine. Sonny answered "Maybe but what if Martin can't come?" Will shrugged "It's in three days. Relax. Enjoy yourself. This is cozy. I like it. I know you like to be able to go out but there's nothing we can do. At least it will keep killers away..." Sonny smirked and returned his attention to the game. When he switched to winning, Will tried tickling him under the foot. Sonny tapped his hands and Berry woke up and ran in every directions. They laughed and exchanged a cheerful look.  
  
The snow stopped the next evening. Will had continued his attempt at drawing, first with Berry, then with Sonny looking out of the window. He was frowning as the absence of natural light made it harder and he decided to incorporate the shadows by rubbing his pencil. The cat came and sat on his wrist, blocking his entire hand. Will got the message. He took the purring intruder in his arms and went next to Sonny "It's OK, you can stop posing." "Hmm what?" Sonny looked like he was taken out of a trance. "What pose?" Will handed him the paper "I thought about tilting it 'Has the snowing stopped yet?' What do you think?" Sonny giggled. He caught the paper and walked to the fire to get a better look. "It's good you know, you're gifted." Will curled his lip. He hadn't drawn for a few years. He was more into computers. Programming and all. He had just begun college and now the semester was ruined. He wondered what excuse his parents had given the administration. Or what they told everyone in town to explain his absence.  
  
Martin spent a few minutes petting Berry. The cat followed them everywhere. Sonny explained they would need cat food the next time (the next time... another week...). Martin nodded and added as he handed the three bags "I put some papers in it for you. I mean newspapers. I though maybe you'd like reading them." Will smiled "Great idea, thanks Martin." They looked at the jeep splashing its way in the muddy path. The snow had melted on the ground but the trees retained white lace and bundles that fell on them as they walked back. Will used a particularly big heap to roll and form a snowball. He put the bag on the side and aimed at Sonny. Sonny jolted then retaliated. They entered the warm cabin and quickly put things away. Will reflected on how fast he had slipped in the routine. There was a place for everything and you couldn't make a mess. The place was too small. "So, wood chore today?" "Nah" said Sonny lazily "It's way too wet. We could give this papers a try?"  
  
Lying on the bed, a new pencil in hand, Sonny was concentrating. Will was playing against a stubborn paw, keeping out of reach of the tiny claws. Berry was still a kitten he thought. She was a girl and that had led to consideration about the name. The nickname worked better for a female and anyway, remarked Will, who were they to be conservative about gender? "Five letters for 'stubborn'?" "Kitty" Sonny frowned even more and waved his hand. Will continued "'Berry'?" Sonny raised his head and pouted. Will laughed and said "'Sonny'!"He saw Sonny's lip stiffen as he tried not to laugh too and came nearer to check the letters "OK, what about 'balky'? I read that one recently in one of your books." Sonny noted the word neatly and answered "They aren't mine. They were here first." They filled the whole crossword amongst many teasing. Will felt like he was on vacation with a friend. And a pet.  
  
"God Sonny, we forgot the letters!" "There aren't any?" The tone was anxious and Will immediately fished at the bottom of the last bag. "Don't worry, let's see if you get more than me." Sonny chuckled "It's not a competition!" Will didn't answer. There was a letter from his dad. After a few loving words, it said:  
  
" _We said you had gone to stay with relatives in Europe. We just got a phone-call from Austin and Carrie. They met Bernardi. He asked about you. Luckily we had warned them so they said you had gone on a trip with a friend around Europe. Justin was right, you really needed to hide._ " The vacation was over. Will sat in the armchair with his stomach hurting. The cat jumped on him but he pushed her away. Sonny put his own letters away and came to read Lucas' one which was lying on the floor. He knelt next to Will and remarked "Well, it wasn't a complete lie. You are spending time with a friend." Will couldn't see much with his blurry eyes but he peeked at Sonny and pressed his hand.


	7. Ecstasy

Will woke up, sweating. He trotted to the fireplace and put his head on the mantlepiece. It was still a little warm. A mewing came from outside and he rushed to the door to retrieve the chilled kitty. He sat with her and rubbed her until she fell asleep. He looked at the clock, that was wasting his time away. Trapped in here. Forever. He was going to die here, far from his family. Bernardi was crooked but he was efficient. Rafe valued him. He felt cold. There was no hope. Look at Sonny, still hiding after more than two months. He envisioned facing his enemy, get it over with. How would dying feel like? Painful? Liberating? The ending. No more Will... His body rebelled. His pajama pants lifted up. Oh. He hadn't thought about it for a long while. Well why not? Let his mind at rest for a few busy minutes. He didn't want to touch himself in here though and walked into the dark bedroom on his way to the bathroom. He stepped in, one hand already in his boxers. He just had the time to wonder why they had forgotten to switch off the light when he saw Sonny. Whose eyes followed Will's arm and widened. He looked up again and their desperate gaze met.  
  
Sonny's hand were strangely avid, groping him, never staying in the same place. Will was taking it all in, the novelty of another man's body. It was an even better way to forget. He panted and that made Sonny even wilder. Their clothes were gone by the time they bumped into the bed and landed on top of one another. Will rubbed his cock against Sonny's belly and groaned. In the dark, he felt it being clutched and then stroked. They didn't talk, just listened to each other's heavy breathing. Will's shaking hand fumbled in the search for Sonny's member. He grabbed it inexpertly and Sonny let out a cry "Sorry, how should I...?" He heard a shushed "Slower... yes... yes... like that..." They didn't do more than stroking but it felt like heaven. Sonny made noises of pure pleasure. It was easier no to see anything. Although Sonny was gorgeous and he was missing on seeing him... entirely. But he could pretend that it was just a sex dream, a parenthesis. He came on one of the pillow. Sonny followed shortly after. They fell down on the sheets and stayed there, in silence. In a way, it had done the trick. Now Will's mind was off deathly threats. It was on how awkward it would be between them now.  
  
They overslept that day. The curtains were tightly shut and it was just when Berry passed between them that the light hit Will's eyelids and woke him up. He sat and let memories of that night rush back. The letter. Bernardi. Sonny. "Sh...!" He stood up and was chillingly remembered he was naked. He looked down at Sonny. He could see a shoulder and it was a very nice one but the rest was thankfully all covered. He got a fleeting urge to sneak a look underneath but pushed it away instantly. No need to add creepy to the list of problems this was going to rise. He dressed quickly and went to the living-room before calling "Hey, Sonny, you might want to wake up. We have to collect wood, remember?" Then he walked outside. He was sipping on his coffee when Sonny joined him, looking sheepish. He sat down and placed his hands flat on the wood. Then he gazed at his hands and uttered "That... That was..." and swallowed. And paused. By the way he sounded, Will could finish himself 'a mistake', 'something to forget', 'inappropriate'. But Sonny actually said '...nice.' He looked up and Will could see he was unhinged "I mean... I... You... I slept better. No nightmares... Which is good because the one that got me up to go wash my face in the bathroom was... particularly awful." Will frowned "What was it about?" Sonny muttered "He had found us. Nick, I mean. And he was armed..." His voice trailed off. Will waited but Sonny didn't explain more. They told each other every details of their dreams so there were two reasons he wouldn't. It was either because the dream had crossed the line of horrible and couldn't be told at all or because what had happened had changed things between them and ruined the budding friendship. Will hoped it was the first one. He needed to get along with Sonny. He said tentatively "Well, I liked it too. I mean... It was soothing... Not that it wasn't also... But you know..." he finished pathetically. Sonny gave him a weak smile. It wasn't how Will had expected his first male sexual experience. Well actually first experience period. But at least he wasn't rejected. Nor disappointed. And in this fucked up situation, at least he had a few good things now. They got up together and waltzed around the table for a moment until Sonny showed Will the way. They brushed against each other and Will flinched but kept walking.  
  
It was weird the way they settled this. During the day, they laughed and talked and played cards or chess. And at nights, they would silently jerk each other to oblivion. No kisses. No sweet words. No foreplay. Just a friendly hand, literally. One day, though, Will walked in to find Sonny looking dejected. He was crouched in the armchair the way he was upon Will's arrival and he looked so vulnerable, Will's heart broke. He knelt down and brushed his arm but Sonny didn't react. Will had an inkling to why he was like that. In a week it would be Christmas. It hurt Will too to think about it and he decided to help the way he knew how. He slowly unbottonned Sonny's belt. Sonny didn't move. Will extracted the flabby member. How could he get it up? Stroking him might be complicated. So he kissed it. Then he licked the length. Sonny went semi-hard. Still no other reaction though so Will kept licking and kissing. After a few minutes he noticed Sonny was biting his lips. He retreated and asked blandly "Why aren't you letting go? You can make noises, I wouldn't mind..." Sonny rolled his eyes and whispered "If I do, I'll be yelling very loud. This is good..." Will smiled and replied "So, what are you afraid of? 'What will the neighbors say'?" Sonny laughed and moaned as Will went back to the licking. He even took a leap of faith and put his mouth at the tip and took it in. Sonny swore. Will gently stroked Sonny's belly when his finger met a scrappy place on the soft skin. He looked up, still sucking. Sonny was out of it, panting and grunting. Next to his navel, there was a scar, about two inches long. He took his hand of it and swallowed Sonny a little more. He was rewarded by a "O'ma'ga', yes, yes, more, please?". Would he gag? He wasn't sure but Sonny looked like he was enjoying himself and Will was relieved he could help him. He pushed further and felt the cock hit the back of his throat. And liquid flowing down. He waited for the throbbing to subside and took it out. He felt a hand brush his hair softly "Thank you. So much. I needed that."  
  
They went to bed and for once, Will wanted to talk. He snuck his hand under Sonny's chin and fired all his questions. He had found out a very graphic book at the back of a cupboard and he wanted to know "Sonny, how did your dad found this place?" Sonny sighed "Last year he went to a convention and he saw a guy he'd been in law school with. They hadn't been buddies at the time but they still reminisced. And they exchanged cards. The man, I think his name is McLone or something..." "McLeod. It's in one of the books." "Right. So he said he was into fishing. He bought this cabin and he went there some week-ends to escape the wife apparently..." Will chuckled. "But he had had a heart attack. And his wife forbade him to come. His daughter had had a son and he was waiting for the kid to grow up to take him there or something. So when dad was preparing the getaway, he called him and asked. The guy said he got it, as a lawyer he knew the limits of the system. He told dad about this handy man who came to fix stuff some years ago..." "Martin?" "Mmmm." Will took a deep breath. He had Sonny in a talking mood and now he was getting to the main question "Sonny?... The scar on your belly... Was it...?" Sonny didn't answer. Will listened to the light breathing, then turned on his back "Yes. I was bleeding all over the floor. He cut me slowly. Then he brought the knife upwards. He was enjoying it, I guess..." Will closed his eyes. Just before falling asleep he was thinking that if they were still there for Christmas, he would offer something to Sonny. Himself.


	8. Rage

Will woke up snuggled in Sonny's arms. He would have stayed that way longer but today was a Martin day. Berry had begun sneaking in the cupboards and they would get cat food. She was still thin but had lost her I'm-starving look. Will washed and trimmed his hair. Then he prepared breakfast and cleaned the main room. He grabbed some paper and drew the lake. Sonny kept all the drawings and had hung them on the bedroom wall. Sonny came with his mug still steaming and sat with a foxy smile. They smelled the fresh air in silence. Will, who had lost at poker, washed the dishes and they went and meet Martin. Berry had gone on a stroll of her own. Martin opened his trunk and took out parcels after parcels. Plus five bags and two more bottles. "These came through the post" Martin gestured to the parcels "And there's food for a Christmas feast and also for ten days. I'm sorry about that but with the holidays, I won't have the time so... I hope you'll enjoy yourself." He had such a kind expression that Will wore his best smile while his heart was breaking. It took them four round-trips. Luckily it was cold enough for them to store part of the food outside. They stayed inside, reading the newspaper's sport section and lazily grazing skin and hair. They didn't make plans for Christmas nor opened the parcels. The letters were lying around, some read, some, not yet. Will had received drawings from his siblings and put them on the wall next to his. It was a fragile balance they kept, not wanting to get upset about missing their family but also not stoically suppressing all feelings.  
  
It snowed again. This time Sonny wasn't worried. But Will was. It felt like Sonny was giving up. And sexual release only got a time-limited escape. They were both too strung up to recapture the light and easy ways of the beginning of their friendship. But they still talked. Sometimes, Will found Sonny with his head buried in Berry's furry belly. He wasn't moving nor smiling. Will sat down on the kitchen table and began drawing from memory. It was hard at first but he wanted to see Sonny smile again. He spent hours every day. The radio was playing in the background, ads, country, hiphop, anything and he didn't like most of what he was hearing but he let it on. It helped with the make-belief.  
  
The day before Christmas, he put his pencil down and decided he couldn't do better. It was far from perfect but he had to know when to stop. He wondered if he would wait for the next day. Maybe put it on the pillow for Sonny to find. He put the paper at the back of one of the cupboard and went to the bedroom for an extra pullover. It had stopped snowing and it was chilly. Their clothes smelled but they couldn't do any laundry for a few days and well... who cared? Sonny was sitting against the bedpost. His eyes were fixed on the opposite wall. The drawing-less one. Will sat too and asked "You want to play chess? Or win back the dishes at poker?" it was as if Sonny didn't hear him. He put his hand on his thigh but Sonny pushed it away, frowning. Will got up and walked to the cupboard. He placed the drawing on the wall at Sonny's eye level. He had had problems with the eyes. Justin had this compassionate and intelligent look about him and it was difficult to commit that to paper. And Adrienne seemed too small and with a slightly weird smile. He was appraising his failings when he heard a sob. Sonny got up and walked to the wall, brushing the faces of his parents with a shaking finger. Will waited. He had become very patient over the weeks. Finally Sonny stood, embracing him on the way up. He was mumbling "Thank you, thank you, I miss them so much. Thanks for being there, I couldn't go through without you." Will pressed his arms around him. When Sonny let go, he was grinning through the tears. It reminded Will of the first day.  
  
Then Will saw him walk to the threshold and hum the fresh air. He didn't follow, rather prepared hot chocolate. It was only hot water and powder cocoa but he had grown to love it. "Sh..." The adrenaline shot an arrow up Will's spine. Sonny's swearing had been low but filled with dread. He ran to the door. There was a figure on the other side of the lake. It was too far to recognize it as more than a person but it was enough for them to panick. Sonny closed the door and went to the small window. He pushed the curtain and peeked. After a few seconds, he let out a long breath "It's a fisherman. My father said some might come for ice fishing. Normally they use heavy electronic equipment but some like to stay traditional and wait. I hoped nobody would come to this lake but at least he won't stay at night. There's no shed. Let's hope he doesn't take anything and move on." "You think he can see the cabin?" "I hope not, but if he does, we'll pretend it's empty. So no fire for now, OK?" Will's heartbeats were slowing down but he was still uneasy. Sonny soothed him with a confident smile and he sat down.  
  
They played cards for a while. Will couldn't help glancing through the gap between the curtains. The man was walking on the ice with a basket. He slipped once and proceeded. The second time, his arms flailed around. Will smiled. It reminded him of some...  
  
He was up before he could think further, face pressed on the window. He looked at the elongated figure, the way he walked, the way the basket seemed quite light. Sonny came next to him "What's the matter, Will?" He sounded surprised more than worried. Will didn't like changing his state of mind but he had to. Quickly. "That fisherman, on the ice... He looks a lot like my cousin Nick!"  
  
Sonny was crunching his hand, breathing loudly. In fact, Will realized, there was a word in that breath "No... No... No..." They stepped back at the same time, still holding hands. They reached the bedroom and Sonny put a trembling hand on the wood trap. Will looked behind him. The cabin was their little nest and now they were losing it. He put his coat and gloves on and crawled out.  
  
It was already almost dark. They crept between the leave-less trees, aiming for the forest itself where they could disappear from view. The snow made their steps silent but marked and they had to keep erasing them which slowed them considerably. They had gone about forty feet when they heard the shouting "F...!" Then "Sonny, I know you're there, show your face, you coward!" Will knew the voice but there was a steel edge to it that almost made his heart stop. He wanted to run but his legs were paralyzed. Sonny wasn't better and they wandered in the forest they knew so well, like two lost children.  
  
"Sonny..." "Yes?" They were pressed against each other, resting against a tree. Will wanted to say it, just in case "If... if we die tonight, I want you to know..." He gulped then went on "I'm so grateful for having met you and all that we've shared... morally and physically, it was... Thank you for all of it..." He felt Sonny's lips on his. It was the first time they'd ever kissed. Maybe the last. They resumed walking, faster this time. Will felt a strange peace come over him. They were far from any town, with no phones. The only thing that could protect them was the gun that was in Sonny's hand. He did know how to use it. He had taken lessons between his attacks. Will hoped that, if Sonny needed to use it, he wouldn't be hindered by his own presence. He stopped and whispered "We should split." Sonny stopped and took Will's hand softly "We only have one gun. What if he sees you first? I'll stay with you and protect you." That's what Will feared "Sonny, you need to focus. I'll hide well. He won't see me. He doesn't know I'm here anyway." Sonny pressed his hand stronger "No, Will. We're in this together. I'm not leaving you alone."  
  
And then Nick was there. A few feet from them. How did he do this? How did he find Sonny in the first place? Did someone talk? Did he guess? In the dark, with his head crowned by the branch of a tree behind, he looked like a demon. A monster. "So, I see you've found yourself a new boyfriend... I guess Andrew was fast forgotten... He paid a high prize and for nothing..." Then his voice changed "Will, is that you? What are you helping that freak? You should have stayed inside." Will was looking at the gleams from both guns, aimed at one another. Sonny had put himself in front of him but he was still visible enough. The last remains of daylight would soon be gone at this time of year. That meant none of the armed men would be able to see the other. It was going to be a massacre. Will tried reason "Come on, Nick, calm the hell down. What happened down there was an accident. And gays aren't freaks. They're just different. Killing someone is not something you want to do, Nick. I've witnessed death. I've seen a killer's face. That's not you. You're just hurting..." "SHUT UP!" Yes, Nick was hurt, you could hear it, but he was also mad. Enraged. Will took a step back. Nick turned his attention back to Sonny. How long before one pulls the trigger? Will started running. He heard both shouts at the same time "Will, no!" "Don't sneak out, you traitor!" and then both shots. One for him, one for Nick.


	9. Surprise

Will fell in the snow. It was strange how slowly the ground arrived. And it was so soft. Which was good because his shoulder burned like hell. Sonny was over him instantly. Shaking him and shouting. Nick was shouting too. Was he also wounded? What was going on? Would he be left in here, bleeding? "If you've killed him..." "What? What will you do, pussy? You're not a real man anyway!" There was the sound of a punch or maybe it was Will's ears which were filling with the sound of his own heartbeats. An incessant drumming. In his head, a sentence was running on like a broken record 'I don't want to die, I don't want to die...' A body landed on him, fortunately on the other side. Whose? It was hard to say. Amongst the grunts and the threats, Will made out enough to get that they still had their guns, under each other's throats. He didn't move at all, terrorized. If only Nick could get distracted. He discreetly scanned the ground under him without moving his arm, just grazing with his hand. His knee was hurting a little so there had to be a branch or a rock. He extracted a stone as big as his palm and tried to dislodge his arm from under him but with the mêlée still going on, he couldn't. So, with immense effort, teeth gritting so he wouldn't cry of pain, he lifted the other one. A red flash passed in front of his eyes but it didn't matter. It was all dark anyway and he didn't need to aim. Just throw hard, though not too far.  
  
And it worked. The stone hit a tree and the seconds that Nick took to turn to the sound was what Sonny needed. One gun fell and hit Will in the eye. He got freed from the extra weight and so quickly grabbed it. He had no idea how to use it but what mattered was who had lost it. He laid his torso over the gun, pointing it in the direction of his shoulder. If it fired, at least, not hurt somewhere new. His body preventing access, he turned to look. Nick head was about a foot away. He didn't see his traits. A silhouette was bent over him and Will almost wept with relief. Yet, even in this position, his cousin wasn't giving up "I won't stop until you die Sonny! You have to die! You and not him! If you die, he'll wake up!" Will couldn't help but be horrifyingly touched. Nick must have loved his friend. The way, he realized, he had come to love Sonny. Not romantically but as a brother or a parent. Someone you would give your life for. Or take a life for? He was well aware Sonny wouldn't shoot. Or at most to injure, not to kill. Will was near enough to make Nick's head explode. Could he? Should he? Was he going to pass out from the pain? He was still pondering when he heard pants and Nick was saying "Give me that! You won't use it anyway." His tone was odd. He sounded annoyed, like he was chastising Sonny. And then, for the second time in Will's life, the world exploded.  
  
When he could hear and feel again, there was hair on his face and wetness covering him. It was too warm to be snow "Will, Will, please, don't be dead, please... I need you. Please, open your eyes!" Will's eyes were open but blinded by Sonny's bangs. He tried and move his hand but he couldn't even feel it. And suddenly, he realized Sonny was holding it and it must feel lifeless. He concentrated and uttered "I'm not..." Then he coughed. Then finished "...dead. Hit in shoulder. Nick?" Sonny wept a little more, making Will almost suffocate. He closed his mouth and shook his head. Sonny whispered "He's dead. We fought for the gun. He pressed the trigger. Right in his face. I threw up." Will digested the information then asked "What do we do now?"  
  
Sonny dragged him back to the cabin. It took forever. There was no light, on purpose and the stars were fully hidden behind the clouds. Sonny left him near the woodshed and went to the door which was hanging on its hinges, broken in half, as Will saw later. Right now, he was pressing on his wound, waiting for Sonny to come back. He heard the sound but mistook it for a storm. Or a hallucination. Sonny brought a warm blanket and lifted Will after wrapping him in it. He took small steps, mumbling and crying. Will tried to stand and fought but Sonny wasn't letting him.  
  
Will felt better inside and sat on the bed while Sonny looked for disinfectant and bandages. "You think the bullet is in the wound?" his voice called. Will felt his shoulder up but it was impossible to say amongst the mind-numbing pain. Sonny sat and gently washed and tended to the wound. Will thanked him and smiled at him when he remembered "Berry?"  
  
Sonny was ransacking the place on his own. He took some meat out and called her again and again, searched the cupboards, looked outside. Will rolled and looked under the bed, hoping to see two tiny reflection of lights but nothing. He went to the bathroom and looked everywhere. He sat back on the mattress, his head hung down. He began crying. For the cat he loved. For the useless death. For his undecided fate, now that Sonny was free and he stilled feared Bernardi. For his damaged body. For wonderful Sonny, exhausting himself to make Will smile. He brushed his nose and pushed the little head away. It was a habit of her to ask for cuddle by pushing his hand over and over. It took his foggy mind long minutes to realize. Then he caught her with one arm and brought the furry ears up to his lips. She meowed and squirmed but he didn't care. He was about to call Sonny when he saw him at the door. He saw the cat and smiled. Will laughed. They remained there, looking into each other's eyes. Then there was a knock.  
  
Sonny turned and walked slowly. Will didn't even bother wondering who was knocking on a broken door at this time of the night. He pet his friend, letting the purr drown the deafening sounds in his ears. She was limp now, trustful. Martin came in and sat down. He was about to put his hand on Will's shoulder but recoiled "What happened Will?" Will shrugged. And winced. Sonny whispered something in the old man's ear and they went to the living-room. Then the door cringed. Sonny came and helped Will to stand up. "We're leaving." Will shook his head. "No, you are. I have to hide still." He knew he needed a doctor but... Sonny hugged him, careful not to touch the wound "You don't get it Will. Martin didn't come for me. Bernardi's been arrested. For all his crooked deal. And they've found the gun he shot Rafe with. You're going home!"  
  
The car's engine. That's what he heard before. Martin parked next to the cabin. Sonny put their bags in the trunk. Will sat with the cat on his lap. He expected Sonny to sit on the front seat and talk things out with Martin but he slid next to him, filling Will with warmth. He asked "Martin, how come you're here, on Christmas Eve? What about your family?" The man laughed. So did Sonny. There must be a joke here. "They'll see me tomorrow. Don't worry. I thought you might want to see your families for Christmas..." Will laughed too. Sonny was brushing the red and soaked bandages and Will got afraid it would stain the car seats and he moved forward. Sonny pushed him back "Don't move..." The words were like an ethereal cure and Will had to reconsider his relationship with him. Was it only friendship?  
  
When he neared the aerodrome, Martin stopped the car, turned the lights on and took out his cell "There's a signal around here." "Who are you calling" Sonny asked "The hospital. They could send a helicopter." "It's OK, I can wait. I'll take the plane!" Will interjected. Sonny kissed his temple "You are so sweet, Will. Don't worry, we won't listen. I just hope I can come with."  
  
And they were seating in a plane headed to Salem. No need for detours this time. The bullet must be buried in a tree somewhere near the cabin. Will had been cared for and Sonny commended on his bandages. They landed around 11 am. They were limousines waiting outside. One for each of them. Will looked at them and said "But where will Berry go? We can't split her in half..." Sonny hugged Will and the cat and said "Take her. I'll see her later. And you."  
  
Will looked at the familiar buildings. He was home. He couldn't make sense of the fact. He hugged his cat and whispered "We're here Berry, this is my home. This is where I belong." He missed Sonny already. He would have wanted his cell back to text him. The chauffeur stopped in front of the Deveraux house and Will took his bag and walked to the door. He knocked, in a haze. Nobody came so he looked for the bell. He knew this place so well. But he felt like a stranger. The door opened. His father stared at him. Will threw himself in his arms. The kitty fled and hid under a table. The commotion made the rest of the family come to the entrance. Will was passed from one person to the other. Later that day, he went to his grandma Marlena's house, to see his mom and siblings. Sami stood there, looking at him, tears all over her face. His sister asked "Did you like my drawing, Will?" "I loved it. I hung it on the wall. But it stayed there, I'm afraid." Then Jon asked "Did you like our present?" Will opened his eyes wide "We haven't opened any one of the parcels. They're back here too!" He looked at all of them and added "I don't mind, you know. Being here today is the best gift ever."


	10. Dejection

When the kids were all tucked up in bed, after having asked many kisses from their returned big brother, Will took his cell and walked to his room. He called Abby "Will, I still can't believe you're back. I was so worried for you! I love you so much!" Will smiled "I love you too, cousin..." "You sound exhausted." "Well, this was a pretty filled night. If I could I would go to sleep for three days..." He ended his speech yawning and Abby laughed "Nothing's preventing you, Will. You must take care of yourself. Will you be seeing a shrink?" "I don't know yet. I'll see. I'll ask Marlena's advice." "Good idea. I'll leave you to sleep, then..." "Abby, wait!" He swallowed then asked calmly, his knee shaking "I don't have Sonny's cell number and I wanted to..." "Sure, Will, I get it of course. You guys have gone through so much together. You must be like brothers now..." Will had a poor smile. Brothers, no... "I'll send it to you. Good night!" Will paced up and down his room. What were they, really? Lovers of opportunity? Physically bounded? Fated to meet? The last one stopped him and he laughed at his sappiness. Two bips announced he had gotten the number. He pressed the button and waited for Sonny to pick up.  
  
"So... How are you feeling?" "Dead tired. You?" "Same. The shoulder hurts less." Wow, it was awkward. The intensity brought up by their previous situation had created a special link. Now the thread was unwinding fast. He closed his eyes and asked "You've had words of how he found you?" "No. Dad say the police will question us. Can you meet him at his office tomorrow afternoon?" Will frowned "Won't you be there?" "I don't know..." His voice trailed on a high tone. Will didn't press it. "Well, I hope I'll see you soon, anyway?" "Will, I... I'm so sorry." "For what, for Nick?" "No... Yes, of course. Oh god, it's... OK, I'll call you when we can meet. Take care!" The line went dead. So did Will's heart. Figuratively, but it still prevented him from getting any rest. He sobbed quietly. Shrink it was, then. He owed it to everyone who had supported him to get better. He even owed it to Sonny. Maybe he just needed some time. He'd seen Nick die. Will knew exactly how horrible it was to go through this. So he stayed lying down. In the near morning, the door opened and little feet trotted to him "I can't sleep. I had a nightmare. Can I sleep here?" Will looked at his brother. He tapped his cover "Come here." Johnny's warm body pressed Will's arm, like Berry did sometimes. The cat had gotten lost at Abby's and Jen had promised to bring her when she turned up. So much for love and care...  
  
Will was walking to Justin's office when he passed EJ, storming out. Justin was yelling after him. Will had never seen him losing his composure. It was frightening. Even EJ had seemed upset and he was hard as steel. Well except when it came to Sami of course. Will stepped past him and looked at Justin questioningly. Justin sighed and sat, trembling with anger "I'm sorry you had to witness that, Will. I'm so angry right now." He stood up and went to a back door. He opened it but didn't step out, leaning his hands on the frame "You know how Nick found you? Because, this... this son of a..." Will jolted. This was bad. "He wanted to impress Sami!... She had just lost her husband and he wanted to get into her pants... Oh, Will, I mean..." Will shook his head. It was crude but factual. Justin went on "So, he hired a private detective to find where you were staying. And the man did and Nick just had to pay him an extra." Will looked at his hand on the desk. It was slowly clenching into a closed fist. Justin turned and saw it. He sat on his chair "I shouldn't have told you that this way. It's just, that... You could both have died... I'm so sorry Will." Then he turned into a lawyer. And they went over his statement for the police about Nick's death.  
  
Two hours later, Will was pounding the door to the DiMera's mansion. He was let in and waited for EJ who came in looking sheepish "William, I... You look good... I mean, except for your shoulder of course... I'm sorry I didn't talk to you at the lawyer office. I wasn't in a normal state of mind." Will looked at him and said slowly "Because you have a normal one? When you threatened my life and Sonny to satisfy your sexual instincts... With my mother!" EJ took a step back, then stopped and regained his self-control. "I know, I shouldn't have... I found your mother crying that day. She said she couldn't bear not to know if you were safe. That she understood why but she missed you so much. I wanted her to smile. At Christmas. The detective brought back a photo. I wanted to give it to her but... Well, she got the real deal..." "No thanks to you!" He wanted to insult him, humiliate him but the man looked... insignificant somehow. Which was a feast. EJ had charisma dripping in every directions. Will strode to the door, but EJ followed him and handed him an envelope "It's yours. I hope one day, you'll forgive me."  
  
Will went to the Brady Pub and sat down. His great-grandmother Caroline came to kiss him hello and marvel at seeing him again. Gabi was working and she greeted Will with excited shouts. Will was beginning to resent the constant attention. He understood what they felt but he wanted quiet. He went to his father's place. Lucas wasn't in and Will lied down for a nap. He was finally sleeping when he got a text notification. He swore and took his phone ' **Found a cute cat. Who shall I give it to? I'd keep her myself, she's so adorable. Abby.** '  
  
The cat was indeed found. Sitting like a princess on Sonny's lap. Abby was beaming, Sonny was looking down. He didn't even acknowledge Will's presence. Will began petting the cat and his fingers touched Sonny's hand. It didn't move. Will got the message. Loud and clear. It wasn't just the shock. He had heard Sonny talking to Abby before coming in. His voice was tired but kind and calm. So he was showing he didn't want him anymore. He didn't need him. The real world would replace him. "So" Abby exclaimed, a little forcefully "Have you decided who keeps her? Or will you arrange custody?" Sonny chuckled. Will felt a lump in his throat "It's decided. Sonny, if you're OK with it, I'd like you to have her. She's always liked you best." Sonny raised his head. He looked sad and remorseful. It was Will's turn to look away "No, Will, you've always loved her. You'll miss her too much." It was true but Will was stubborn. Of all this, he wanted to keep at least his dignity. He would be strong.  
  
He came back to his father's. Lucas was happy to see him and they talked a lot. "So..." Lucas asked delicately "You and Sonny, you have grown close over the month...?" Will gritted his teeth, smiled and said "Yeah. We're like brothers now. But he needs to spend time with his family so I won't bother him. And I have to catch up with all of you and with my friends too." Lucas thought for a minute then said "How about we celebrate your birthday late and invite everyone? Not next week, it's New Years Eve but the week after? We can spoil you that way..." Will hugged his dad "Thank you, you're the best." He hoped Lucas wouldn't hear about EJ's involvement. He might want to kill him.


	11. Disgust

Will knocked at the big fancy door. Just then, it opened for Adrienne Kiriakis "Will! I'm so glad to see you! I'm on my way to meet your aunt Jen." She took his hand "I wanted to thank you Will. Sonny said he wouldn't be alive without you. I owe you so much." Will put on a smiling facade and brushed the compliment away "I mostly panicked and acted without thinking. Your son is really brave and strong." Adrienne had a proud smile. "I wanted to see him, actually. Do you know where he is?" Adrienne frowned "Oh, honey, he didn't call you? He left town." A chill hurt Will's spine. "He did...?" "Yes. Did he tell you about his boyfriend, Andrew? He's woken up. Sonny wanted to be by his side of course. He left yesterday night." Will forced himself to answer "Well, that explains why he forgot to tell me. It must be such a relief for him."  
  
He didn't answer Abby's phone calls and ignored Gabi's texts. He refused Tyler and Neil's offers to hang out at The Rainbow.When his childhood friend T passed him and started yelling at him for being gay, he didn't react. He had asked Marlena for a good psychologist. He had talked with her about the loneliness and the attack and all that stuff. But he hadn't brought up Sonny. He couldn't. As if discussing what happened between them would put it in the past. He knew it was stupid but he clung to hope. Maybe when he would be back. If he dressed sharply enough...  
  
But Sonny did come back. Abby mentioned it. She said she had asked him to join their group for New Year's Eve but he declined and said he already had plans. Will came home crying. He remembered Sonny saying he and Andrew and him were casual. So, he didn't want serious. And Will had to let go. He asked his mother for sleeping pills. She gave it to him with a worried look. Then she said "By the way, I wanted to ask you what you plans were for New Year's Eve. Are you going out?" "Yes, with Abs and Chad and Gabi and Mel." Sami smiled "That's great! Well, I hope you'll be kind with me when I say that... I don't have a date... I couldn't... But EJ has offered to spend the night having a little fun... Do you think I should? I mean... I miss Rafe horribly but he wouldn't have want me to despair and..." Will took a deep breath. How did things turn out so complicated? This wasn't his year. Let's hope the new one would be better.  
  
Well, it didn't bode well. Gabi was being hit on by a suave Italian she met at the party. Abby and Chad were kissing non-stop, as if rehearsing for midnight. Mel was supportive and funny but her dad came and whisked her away to the hospital celebrations. Will had gone out and was sitting in a dark corner. Alone in a crowd. As opposed to alone in the forest. But he wasn't alone then. Sonny was there, talking and laughing and... He got up and walked away aimlessly. The Pub was busy and his grandma Caroline had gone to bed. There was no one he knew and he walked into the cold, steely kitchen where employees ran efficiently, purposely. Will felt broken. He had trouble readjusting and his life was on hold. He would start college in a month only. His parents were busy. His family was getting used to seeing him again and stopped fussing as much. Martin had sent back all their stuff. He had forgotten his drawings though. Maybe he thought they were here before. Will thought about calling him. It would feel good talking to this stranger who'd been so kind to him and Sonny. He opened the little fridge in the staff room. He'd worked here the last summer and Caroline had told him he could always help himself here. It was empty though. He searched a little around and in a cupboard, he found a vodka bottle. The need for the peace that alcohol could bring hit him like a ton of brick. He put one hand on a table and closed his eyes, fighting against himself. He managed not to open it but still opened his backpack to put the bottle in. He saw the envelope. He had forgotten about it. Slowly, he took it out and stared at the photo.  
  
There he was, drawing the lake. Berry was seated on the table behind him, her eyes on the paper, as if she was judging its quality. Sonny was standing at the door, hand on the handle. Will remembered that moment. They were about to eat dinner. For a fleeting moment, he thought he could smell the air of that day, of that minute. Fresh and pure and filled with cat and raviolis and Sonny. And it came back to him. Sonny taking care. Listening to him. Making sure he was OK. Kissing him in the forest just before... He took the bottle out and replaced it in the cupboard. Then he took his cell and prepared a New Year's message. He heard shouts and yipees but didn't go outside the room. He sent the text to all his friends and family. And to Sonny. Time to be friends. Of course he only got notifications that said the texts were delayed. But he had time. He walked to his grandma Marlena's home. She wouldn't be there but he had the key. He had so many keys. Each for a place he was welcomed. But none to his own world, his own decisions. His happiness.  
  
He lied down on the couch. With the noise outside, it was impossible to sleep. The notifications were arriving too. And the answers. It felt good to have all these friends. Sonny wrote ' **Happy New Year. Sorry about earlier. Hope to CU one of these days. I'll explain.** ' Will sighed. He sent back ' **Come to my bthday, plse?** ' ' **When's your birthday?** ' ' **Twas November the 27th. Was with U then. Party is next wedn** ' ' **K I'll bring a gift. So 17, hm?** ' ' **No 18**.' Then the flood of messages stopped and the tumult died down. Will slept. He dreamt that Sonny was wearing antlers on his skull and Nick had rabbit ears and hid in a hole in the ground. Then Sonny turned to him and he was normal and he said 'Will. I need you.'


	12. Overcome

Will looked around. Gays and straights, everyone was there, enjoying themselves. He was surrounded by gifts, on his lonely island once again. How could you feel alone on your f... birthday? Abby had arrived last, explaining Sonny had called that morning. He was in Minneapolis, taking Andrew home. Will had given up. He wasn't trying to talk or dance. He stood there, a fake smile plastered on his face, bleeding emotions drenching his soul. He got called for the candled cake and cheered at, then he walked to his bedroom and sat at his desk. How could he be in that state? When Rafe had died, that was a tragedy. Maybe that was it. He was still fragile and he mistook it for a broken heart. There hadn't been any promises or even tender words. No declaration.  
  
"Will!" It was Gabi. Will didn't move. She would let go, he knew it. Their story had died down fast. Gabi was beautiful and nice but a little self-centered soul. Then Will had kissed a guy and all that was left was a superficial friendship. He took out a paper and began drawing. The cabin, the forest around and Sonny standing in the front. "Will!" This time it was Chad "We've got new company. Get your ass in here!" Will sighed and left the paper on the desk, ready to be a good host again. He went back to his father's living-room. Chad was roaring in laughter. Abby was pushing his arm with a mock look of contempt. There was someone standing next to them and Will stopped. He could go back to his room discreetly and pretend he didn't hear. Maybe he would leave. Which was stupid of course, he invited him. Why was he always running from his troubles? He had to stop finding excuses and just accept the hurting. Like he did with Rafe. He was 18, he was sure to have romantic deceptions in his future, after all. He walked up to Sonny and patted his back. Sonny turned his head slightly and his eyes widened. A little surprised at this reaction, Will gave him a glowing smile "Hi, Sonny, I'm happy you came. How is Andrew doing?" Sonny turned entirely and began stammering "Hi, Will, I... Happy Birthday... You... He's... fine. Well... better at least. I had to tell him about Nick..." "Oh my god!" Will exclaimed. He hadn't thought about that. All his jealousy was washed away and he pictured a recovering young man discovering the insanity of a friend and the hardship a lover went through because of him "That must have been so hard. How are you holding up?" He took Sonny's hands in his and looked into his eyes. There was a lot going on in there, it seemed. He didn't try and analyze it though and brushed a few of Sonny's fingers in a comforting manner. Sonny gave him a sly smile and took his hand back "Wait, I have a present for you, I'll..." He was gone in a swift. Will's arms dangled at his sides. He felt overwhelmed but holding his own. Looked like he was healing. Sonny came back with a bag and gestured to the hallway "Can we...?" Will looked around. His guests were having fun, dancing and eating and laughing. Chad and Abby had sat down on the couch with Mel and Gabi. He nodded.  
  
"I want to apologize for the way I acted, Will." Will answered quickly, to get this over with "No, it's OK, I get it, you were badly shaken by the attack and Nick and... And of course, with Andrew and all you were busy too. I completely understand. I mean, we don't have to be fast friends. But I'm glad you came, it means a lot to me." Sonny looked the picture of misery. Will was at loss. Why come if he felt that bad? Sonny sighed and opened the bag. He took out a potted flower. It was pink and looked like a bunch of plenty little flowers facing different directions. "It's a rhododendron. Martin says it's the state's symbol. I thought..." Will looked at the flower, uncomprehending. "Which state?" "Washington. That's where the cabin is." Ohhh "Yes, I remember now. He said he had family in Seattle. Wow, we went far." Sonny nodded, eyes on the ground "Well, thanks. It's... I love it." Sonny took the bag again. There was another gift. Will was feeling too much things at the time and waited for the moment he could be alone again. "I saw this shop in Minneapolis and I thought..." Will took the wrapped parcel with trembling hands. He took out the material. It looked excellent quality. Fine brushes, India ink, little tubes of paint. Will took Sonny's hand in his and went to his bedroom. He put his gifts on the desk and turned to hug Sonny. For how long as he could. Sonny didn't move and after a moment he whispered in Will's ear "So, you're really 18?" "Yeah." "You were at the cabin?" Will nodded, not sure where this was headed. Sonny took a step back and said hesitantly "When we got... intimate, I didn't really think it over. It helped us survive a little better and you seemed fine. So, I just... overlooked the fact that I'm 20 and you were under-aged. And then we got home and it hit me. I couldn't let it go on. I forced myself not to look at you too much, not to remember how you felt. How you sounded at nights. How soft and cold your lips were when we were about to die and just having you there was giving me so much strength. When you fell in the snow, I..." Will's breathing was off the rack. He was busy making sense of all this and when he was sure of what Sonny was saying he took him in his arms again but not for a hug. Their lips met again and he was back there in his head, running in the dark, opening his heart to Sonny. It never closed again, he realized. It stayed pouring with feelings for him. So he kissed a little harder and Sonny moaned, then crouched on Will's bed. Their mouths opened and Will felt the wet mouth welcoming his tongue. He stopped after a moment and panted a little. He took Sonny's hand and asked "Sonny, are we... Do you want us to date?" Then, he remembered and doubt crept back in "Unless you and Andrew... I mean, if you like him more, I... I'll understand. I just..." Sonny shut him up with another kiss. "Come on, Will, Andrew and I weren't serious, I told you already. I mean, after what happened I feel responsible for him. But you, I..." He sighed and Will smiled, happy beyond belief.  
  
He showed Sonny the drawing. Maybe now, he thought, he could add colors to it. Sonny grazed the paper with a slow finger. "It's funny but I miss it in a way. I mean I was miserable sometimes but it was also... like this private little world, filled with simple things. And I could look at you whenever I wanted. Your eyes... I dream about them every night." Will remembered his own dream. Did Sonny really need him? He looked like he did. He decided to answer "I dream about you, too. I missed you so much." Sonny took his hand "You want to dance? Before your party is over?"  
  
Sonny's arms were strong around his waist. Will had put his head on Sonny's shoulder and was relaxing and reliving. Now his friends didn't seem like strangers. Now he could have fun at his birthday. When the slow song was over, they walked to the couch and Will joined in a few conversation, along with Sonny who was so very at ease. Will was laughing and not letting go of Sonny at any time. He wished he would stay at night but he scolded himself. No need to rush things. They had all the time in the world.


	13. Joy

Will was pacing his mother's living-room. He had spent the afternoon with his siblings and now he was waiting for Sonny to pick him up for their date. There was a muffled knock which made him jump out of his skin. He opened promptly to a sniffing basket. He felt a rush of tenderness as he lift the pink wobbly nose to his. The cat brushed her face against his cheek. Will put the basket on the kitchen table and hugged her. He turned to Sonny who was patiently waiting. He had a soft smile and said simply "It's your turn to have her. She misses you too much, I know it." Will smiled and took the feline against his heart. She wriggled out of his arms and jumped on the bar. She sniffed around the new place and Will took a bowl and poured some water. "Thanks. I missed her too." He took a hesitant step to the man he was so very intimate with, two weeks ago. Sonny approached his lips and a clear-fountain-like feeling found its way up Will's chest. He welcomed the kiss and put his hands behind the bushy hair to hold on something. Sonny wrapped his arms around him as if for a dance and Will melted in it. He had found he loved dancing with Sonny at his birthday and he began searching for ways of making that happen again fast. Sonny ended the kiss, then gave him another peck and stared into Will's eyes. Time stopped. They had traveled miles since that first night at the cabin, losing their footing and wandering, searching for that very moment.  
  
They sat on the couch to keep the connection for a little while longer and Sonny caressed Will's shoulders making him wince. He unbuttoned his shirt and unveiled the scarred skin. Sonny brushed it and asked "Is it going to stay?" Will shrugged, slightly, not to hurt more "The doctor says so. I guess, that way we share something." Sonny looked at him, his eyes dark "That's not what I intend to share with you, Will." Will scraped his nose on Sonny's cheek and asked "What do you want to share?" Sonny thought for a minute "Well, lots, actually... Moments like this, sure... But also,... friends. The one I met at your party were great. Of course we already both know Abigail. She told me she was happy we would be dating by the way. That she was worried for Berry, growing up in a broken home and all..." Will snorted. Sonny added "And I'd like to share memories. New ones. Lighter. Going to fun places, enjoy life... I want to go swimming with you in the Michigan." Will pinched his lips "Mmm, in a few months, then. You have other ideas?" "Yes. Go and see a movie. Go and choose a late Christmas gift for my Mom with your help. Go to a bar and play darts. Look at your family scrapbook to see how you looked as a kid..." "My head is spinning, Sonny. You want to do that all at once?" Sonny nodded "Actually I gathered you would be the one to decide what we do tonight." Will's mind drew a blank. He had wanted Sonny. He had him. That was it really. He shook himself. They were back in the world and it had many things in store for them. What about that dancing thing? There was a jukebox at the Cheatin' Heart.  
  
Sonny opened the door to the street and let Will out. They walked a few steps lazily, enjoying the winter sun. Will tore his eyes of Sonny's beaming face to look where he was going. T and a bunch of his mates were advancing in their direction. Will wasn't feeling as down as he did at their last confrontation but he wasn't keen on hearing his hurtful words and have him hurt Sonny's feelings. "Hey, Will, looks like you found another fairy to play with! Does he know what a coward you can be? Well, I guess he's one too..." Will closed his eyes, nauseous. Sonny's hand was hardening around his and he could feel the anger boiling in the air coming from his boyfriend. It was a good thing he didn't have the gun anymore Will thought. He turned and placed a hand on Sonny's chest "They're not worth it." Sonny nodded but still walked to them. He stood in front of T and his voice came from the depth of chilly glacier and rumbling lava all at once "I have dealt with a real homophobic freak recently. He's now rotting under the moon and I'm still there. And still gay. Homophobia belongs to the past so I suggest all of you get up to date and let us be. And if you EVER badmouth Will again..." His tone was so threatening, even Will took a step back. "... I will make your life a living hell. That's a promise..." Will felt aroused, violently. Nevertheless, he had had enough of verbal and physical attacks. He pulled Sonny to him and whispered "The bar, Sonny, remember?" Sonny turned and his face went through a drastic change, from tormented to lit from the inside. "Yeah, right, let's lose this dumbass." He followed Will, leaving behind a dumbstruck T whose friends had deserted the moment Sonny had mentioned Nick's death. Will's gut were disintegrating but he strode on.  
  
Will searched solace in Sonny's embrace, moving his hips slowly to the soft music but something was off. T had been on the mark. He felt a coward. Fleeing from troubles. The song ended and a more metallic band started playing. Will turned and saw Chad near the jukebox, waving, his usual smirk twisting his mouth. Sonny shook hand and started chatting "So," asked Chad "How is living in Salem like? You don't find it too boring?" Sonny glanced at Will and pressed his hand "No, it's OK. It's easier to make friends actually. Well, apart from the Neanderthals roaming the streets... Why would you say that? Are you planning on moving away?" Chad shook his head "Not unless Abby wants to. I'm kind of anchored here. You know what's that like, right?" Chad's tone was of friendly teasing but Sonny's reply was so grave it was almost solemn "I do. I couldn't manage on my own. Believe me, I tried..."  
  
Will felt much better all of a sudden. Sonny showing his vulnerable side made him his equal in a way. Chad walked back to the pool game and they sat in front of their drinks. Sonny sipped on his beer, Will took a gulp of soda then put it down and said "I love looking into your eyes, you know, they have everything you are feeling written all over them..." Sonny brushed Will's cheekbone and answered "Yours are just dreamy. That's the first thing I noticed about you. When I saw you properly in the morning, I mean. How blue and deep they were. Berry has blue eyes too and having her around was torture, because she reminded me of you every minute." Will sighed. Sonny looked at him, concerned "Are you still upset about me having her?" Will shook his head and smiled from ear to ear "No, you're just making me very happy. It's almost too much. I had no idea you found me attractive" Sonny grinned "I know. I complimented you a few times and you never got it. You even thought I was talking about the cat. How can you look like you do and not be proud and cocky?" Will blushed.  
  
Lucas had just gone for a business trip, so Will took Sonny back to his place. The mess his birthday had caused was under control and would soon be completely tidied. When Sonny would have left, which meant never, in Will's fantasies. He had left a note for his mom about feeding the cat in the morning. Now, they reached his bedroom. There was only a narrow bed and Will wondered if they should use the couch. But then Sonny kissed him. He kissed him a lot now, as if he was making up for lost time. They lay on Will's bed, Sonny grazing his elbow and arm. Will moaned. His hand crept up Sonny's thighs. He wanted to hold Sonny again. Make him pant. Sonny looked at him prudent. Well, Will thought, they could take it where they had left it at the cabin. They started making out heavily, hands roaming asses, thighs, crotch. Will was so hard, he wanted to strip naked, just to feel less tight. Sonny looked at him and said "I want you, Will. So much. I want to feel all of you. But I'll wait for you to be ready. So what are you comfortable with?" Will uttered "I want to look into your eyes and stroke you until you come. I want you to tell me all what you feel. I want to make you feel good." Sonny sighed and brushed Will's cheek. Sonny opened Will's jeans' button and grazed under the boxers' waistband. The shudder he got in response seemed to turn him on even more. "Will?" His breathing was jerky "Yea?" Will wasn't better. He didn't move. "Could you? I mean, I'd like to see you, hum... I mean, back there, it was dark and..." Will answered softly "Only if I can see you too...". Slowly, reverentially, Sonny took Will's jeans off. And his socks. He pulled both sweater and shirt in one go. He put his hand on the boxers but Will stopped him and opened all of Sonny's buttons, everywhere. Including the one on his boxers. Sonny chuckled "No need to open those, you know." Will stilled then laughed. He felt like he was opening a new gift and it was the best of all. He took the waistband between two fingers and led Sonny's hand to his. They looked into each other's eyes then simultaneously took them down.  
  
Will caught his breath. Sonny was gorgeous. He was nervously biting his bottom lip and Will brushed it and asked "So, can I...?" He felt shy and slightly unhinged by the focused lust he could read in Sonny's eyes. He was used to despair or weariness. Sonny slowly stroke him and he lost his inhibitions and stroke too. He kept glancing down, eyeing Sonny's cock, wanting it. He remembered how it tasted and panted louder. Sonny pressed him against his chest and began grinding, his heavy muscled body on top of Will. They kissed and came in the kiss, swallowing the other's scream.


	14. Accord

There was something wrong. It was too warm in there. Had they forgotten to put out the fire? He writhed under Sonny's weight and almost fell down the bed. How... What? He paddled around, looking around in confusion at his night table. The cell was the clue. He sat on his elbows and waited for reality to set in. He was back in Salem and yet, Sonny was in his bed. Propped against the wall as it happened. Will felt streams of delight wash over him. He refrained from disturbing Sonny's sleep and went to the kitchen. He remembered how Sonny praised his cooking and started a pancake batter. He was humming as he prepared coffee. He thought about offering his father a french press. The water boiled and started dripping in the bowl. The strong smell did its trick. Messy dark hair appeared at the door. Will looked from the pan and giggled at the intricate pattern Sonny's groggy steps were tracing. "Hi! Are you OK? Not too stiff? Sorry about the bed..." Sonny lift his eyes and focused his gaze on him "I slept wonderfully. I always do when I can feel you before." He wrapped his arms around Will's, thwarting his cooking endeavors "If you want unburnt breakfast, Son, you'll have to stop that. At least for now..." Sonny obeyed and opened the coffee-maker lid "I like french press better." Will smiled "So do I. I'll buy you one for your birthday. When is it?" "July 25th" OK, a summer birthday then..." Will was daydreaming about barbecues and picnic at the lake and almost let the pancake overcook. He laid it down and caught the maple syrup. Sonny was sitting, watching him with a contented smile "I'm thinking of hiring you as a live-in maid." Will laughed "With the full frilly outfit?" Sonny closed his eyes and frowned "No, I meant... a butler, rather. With shiny buttons and all." Will finished his baking and sat on Sonny's laps. He kissed him full mouth and whispered "You'd have to pay me lots." Sonny kissed him again, his tongue tasting bitter with the coffee. Will sighed happily. Sonny whispered back "I know, I'll ask you later, when I get rich. For, now, I can only pay you with kisses. You deserve a tip." Will's cell brutally startled them and Will regretfully got up and answered. He paled and looked at Sonny who walked to him and waited at his side, rubbing his back. Will hung up and said "Mom tried feeding Berry but she refuses and just threw up all over the place. Now she's lying down and won't move." Sonny hugged Will tight, sending strength with every caring muscle. Will calmed down enough to ask softly "Sonny, can I... Do you mind if I go now?" Sonny's eyes turned dark and intense "I do mind, Will. This is my cat too, I'd like to be there for her too, you know." Will walked to his room, in a daze.  
  
Sonny drove to the apartment. Will was looking out the window, worrying. He ran to the front door without waiting for Sonny. He rushed in and saw the despondent kitty. She brushed her head against his arm and mewed faintly. Will felt so bad he wanted to throw up too. Sonny was busy introducing himself to Sami and her children. Will walked to the door still holding Berry, driven by fear, but stopped. He turned to Sonny and saw his slightly hurt expression. He let out a short exhale and stammered "Let... Let's go to the V..vet... We'll talk on the way, OK?"  
  
"You can hold her if you want..." "No, she's comfortable. Let's hurry." Will tried not to squeeze the cat too hard. Sonny pushed the door and ushered them in the hall. A young kind receptionist instantly took things in hand and they were led to one of the consultation rooms. While they were waiting for the practitioner, Will was praying silently "Please don't die, please don't die...". Sonny hugged him and murmured "She won't" Will looked at him and asked" How do you know?" Sonny shook his head "No one else is allowed to die. Even a cat. You've gone through enough." Will tapped Sonny's jacket. He wanted to hide in it, bury himself against his boyfriend's chest but he manned up and apologized "I'm so sorry, Son. I... kind of lost it. As you say, it's been too much and I can't bear the idea of losing her..." The cat mewed and sent them a tired look. "She's so small..." He looked back at Sonny "I've acted like a jerk and I'm sorry. I should have been more considerate of your own feelings." Sonny chuckled "You're the sweetest guy I've ever met, Will. I've seen you go through hell and back and you always worry about others: Rafe or your Mom or me or Berry. Even when you've been shot. Why do you think I l... like you so much?" Will felt soft and less shaken. He kissed Sonny with abandon.  
  
They were interrupted by a little cough. The vet was a tall woman with hair in a ponytail. Will jumped, not sure where she stood about homosexual couples. Half the people he met were quite vocal about it. She stayed silent, though and he looked at Sonny, then turned to her and hurriedly explained. The vet had to make him repeat when he talked to fast. She took the cat and started the exam. Then she put her tools down and said "I understand you would be a little panicked. Sometimes, cats go through serious illness and do throw up and look amorphous. So, good reflex to bring her. However..." She took her glasses and sat down with a serious air "Do you know how old she is?" "No" Sonny hissed "She's a stray. She was malnourished when we found her." She nodded "That would explain it..." Will put his hand on the tiny head. She felt cuddly and warm and trustful. Was he betraying her? Making her think she was safe in here with him... He closed his eyes and prepared for the bad news. "Well, from what I observed she must be around 7 or 8 months old. It's a little young but I guess she'll be OK. You have taken good care of her." Will opened one eye. Where was she going with this? "Morning sickness do not last as long as with human luckily. She'll be soon back to normal. And putting on weight, though as she was very thin to begin with, it won't be that obvious. It will depend of the number of course..." "Of what?" asked Sonny.  
  
Will looked at the little miracle-holder. She suddenly looked mysterious and serene, bringing the revenge of new life against her near previous starvation. He smiled tenderly and walked up to Sonny "She's pregnant, Son. Did you let her out?" Sonny looked even more confused "I was out of town most of the time. The butler must have let her... So she'll be all right?" The woman smiled "I think so. I'll give you some brochure about taking care of her and of the kittens after. She might be more affectionate than usual and less energetic too. Be careful how you feed her too." "We will..." the vet took them out and added "I'm always glad to see such cat lovers as you are. I would love a kitten myself but my girlfriend's allergic. Pretty ironical, hey?" Will laughed and walked to Sonny who was paying. And wouldn't hear of sharing the cost. Will let it go and they walked back hand in hand, with the cat buried under Sonny's jacket this time. Will swore himself he would take her place later on.  
  
Sami laughed and let the children pet Berry under her supervision "Well, I should have guessed! When I was pregnant with you I threw up every morning for three months. Not as much for your siblings, fortunately. I guess it's being a young mom." Sonny had a hungry look on his face "Sami... Can I call you that?" "You saved my son's life, you can even call me mom if you want." He smirked "I think my mother would mind. Anyway, I wanted to ask you for photos of Will. When he was a kid, you know...?" Will ran to the closet to get rid of the compromising pictures before and had to fight a determined Sonny who wanted to see everything "Because you can never look ridiculous to me, I've seen your darkest moment and your biggest fear. I'd like to add a little carelessness. I promise you'll see mine. I've already destroyed the ones I didn't like anyway..." Will pinched his ass. Sonny yelped and tickled him. The cat joined them, having escaped the kid, looking better already and they played with her a while. "Will you come to the mansion, Will? My mom has invited us to lunch."  
  
Will entered the mansion a new person. Sonny's boyfriend. They encountered Victor, the house patriarch and Sonny's great-uncle. He knew Will already and greeted him with a large smile and shook his hand for a long time. Will smiled politely and waited for Sonny to come and rescue him from his embarrassment. But it was Justin who joined them. Will wondered if he had told his family about EJ's mistake and if anyone else might learn it. Adrienne arrived along with Sonny who took Will's hand and led him to the dining room.  
  
After lunch, Will felt dizzy, having be closely questioned by everyone at the table. Sonny kept his promise and they walked to his bedroom with a few scrapbooks. Will entered the room and looked around. There was something very familiar. It felt like in the cabin and he took a step to one of the walls. There was a drawing hanging, expertly framed. He almost didn't recognize his work. All around the room, he saw it exposed. "Wow. I thought Martin hadn't sent those. I was thinking of calling him." Sonny dropped the scrapbooks on his desk and came behind him. Will felt stupidly proud and touched. He walked to each wall, then turned to Sonny and gave him an excited peck "I don't see the one with your parents. It wasn't very good, I guess. I'm still so happy to have given you some relief at the time." Sonny kissed him and said "You about save me from despair that day. And the drawing is in my parent's room. They love it. I wanted to keep it myself but mom gave me a photo of her and dad and stole it. She said you were a special soul and she was glad our path met. I told her I wasn't so sure as I was trying and forget you at the time." Will frowned "And those were supposed to help that?" Sonny looked shy. It was the first time he did and Will thought he looked cuter than the cat. He wanted to squeeze him till he couldn't breathe but merely did what he had aimed at earlier. His hair grazing the collar, his nose on the shirt, he made Sonny walk backward and fall on the double bed. Sonny brushed his hair and said "Well, my little cuddler, I found the limits of my willpower. I created my little bubble of make-belief. That maybe, when you got older... If your parents hadn't filed a complaint against me..." Will laughed, trying and picture his mother being all righteous and failing hysterically. As for his father, he had wanted to say his gratitude to Sonny but hadn't had the opportunity yet. "Well, we both know they can't and I'm old enough, so why not cover the extent of what we can do together?" Sonny didn't look shy anymore. He growled "Talking about that, I believe I have a debt to pay." Will frowned "You do?"  
  
He did. And he paid it good, taking Will deep inside his mouth, making him squirm. And bite his lips not to let Sonny's family know how good their son was at being gay. Will realized he had a lot to learn in here. He hoped he would be pretty enough to keep Sonny interested until then.


	15. Trust

They were lying on the bed, leafing through the scrapbooks. Some photos were taken in Texas, others in Dubai. And on vacations, too. Sonny always had that big smile and looked about to jump out of the picture, if he wasn't already running or climbing or jumping. Hard to imagine he would just sit lazily, cuddling, like he did now. Will didn't even feel like teasing and just asked serious questions and marveled at his cuteness and the constancy of his smile. He could turn and see the exact same one just for his benefit and he loved that. “Will,” Sonny whispered “Yea?” “You know, if Bernardi wasn't in jail and you had to stay in the cabin, I would have stayed. Even after Nick's death. I would have taken care of you.” “No, you wouldn't have. You missed your family too much.” He tapped the photos “And your freedom.” Sonny grabbed him by the back of the neck and kissed him. Will felt small and devoured by raging feelings. He wanted to tell Sonny about this fire inside but not now, when they were quiet and happy at least. Sonny shook his head “No. I didn't have time to think much ahead at the time. So much was happening... But I saw you bite your lips when I put the bandage on. It must have hurt like hell. You're so brave. I would have felt I was betraying you by leaving.” Will didn't answer at first. He brushed Sonny's knee, enjoying the hard reality of the bone under the skin “I didn't want you to leave. You're ten times braver than I am. I felt safe with you. At home, somehow...” Sonny squeezed him from behind. Will felt a kiss being pressed on his shoulder “Same.”

They were kissing ardently when there was a knock at the door “Sonny, it's me...” Will got agitated hearing Justin's voice, seeing they were both seriously naked and quite stimulated. Sonny answered flatly “What is it dad?” “The police wants to see both of you, now. I'll be coming with you of course. I'll wait in the hall, all right?”

While Sonny was already walking downstairs, Will took was putting his clothes back on. His jeans made a creasing noise and he fished the photo out of the pocket. He smiled and placed it on the night table.

Will felt weird at the station. He'd been there quite a few time, visiting his granddad before he retired, but now, he was being asked questions, by policemen he didn't know, some of which had come all the way from Washington State. They didn't look mean, just blank and Will began doubting his own memory. He had prepared the interview with Justin but it was still stressful. The cops needed precisions that hadn't come to his mind “You say he was distracted, Mr Kiriakis. By what?” Will blushed and mumbled “It was me...” All stares turned to him and he closed his eyes hurriedly. He forced himself to relive the scene. “I found a rock under me and I threw it, like that... The noise made him look away.” Both Kiriakis pair of eyes opened wide. Will waited and their statement was dully noted down. They walked out and Justin left them after they declined his kind offer for a ride. They walked to the park, just next to the station. It was deemed the safest to be at night but even though it was just early winter dusk, Will was shivering and he staggered to a bench, pulling Sonny with him. Two arms circled around him, warming his body and his soul. They stayed that way for a while, silently helping each other clear out from the trauma of the interrogation till Sonny asked “Will, there's something... I don't wanna put you back there again, but...” “It's OK, you're allowed to ask me anything, at all time. I trust your judgment.” There was a pause and a gulp. Then he heard “It's just... When you said, you distracted him... And by the way, I can't thank you enough for that.” Will nodded. Sonny went on “You mimed it. And you moved your left arm.” “Yes, so?” “That's the one with the wound, Will.” “Oh... Humm... Well, there was one of you on top of me at the time. I couldn't move the other one so...” Sonny took a short breath “That must have been horrible.” Will passed his fingers in Sonny's bangs, trying and see his eyes. There was a lot in them, as ever and he didn't want to miss any of it. “I survived. At least I wasn't struggling with a maniac.” Sonny shook his head “Will, listen, it's really important.” “Mmm?” “Please, stop degrading what you did. I couldn't have done that, never. I couldn't even shoot him.” “Neither could I.” “You were wounded. I thought you were dead. I wanted to kill him because of that, because you were too precious, too sweet for him to hurt you...” Will was crying. Sonny brushed a very careful finger on his cheek and murmured “And I'm sorry I sat on you. I didn't mean to, I swear. At least not like that...” Will giggled through his tears “I'm glad you know, Sonny. Not for Rafe's... Or what Nick did to you but because we met. And it changed me. A lot.”

After that, no more words, just mouth over mouth, hands molding their willing bodies, legs mingling and grazing. “Sonny, I... I want...” Sonny stood up, still kissing him deep and they started pacing, aiming for the nearest home they could think of. It happened to be Lucas' place again and once the door was closed, Sonny's shirt lost all its buttons. Will's pullover flew by his eyes and disappeared from view. They didn't reach the room and just fell on the couch. Amongst the delicious mind melting Sonny's caresses were giving him, Will managed and utter “Sonny, I have condoms...” Sonny suspended his touch and asked breathlessly “Are... Are you... You want...? Now?” Will got up and rushed to the bathroom. He got condoms at his birthday. It was a present from Neil. Along with a wink and a “Welcome among the living. I guess you've been missing out, hey?” Neil didn't know Will's love life, apart from the fact that he had outed Will, getting out of his car and kissing him in front of reporters who were there for a club opening. The photo had been on the news and taken care of any classical coming out. He had tried leading Will to more physical intimacy but Will wasn't into casual. Nor really into Neil. He never felt what he was feeling now, that need, eating him up, pushing him against Sonny, wanting to merge with him. Sonny was looking at the condom like he'd never seen one before and Will hoped like hell he had. He pushed the thought aside. It wasn't possible to picture Sonny being irresponsible. Although, he seemed dumbstruck and Will tenderly brushed his arm and asked “What's going on, you don't want to...?” “Oh, I do” Sonny was back to sounding sexy. Will shuddered and it didn't stop. He wanted to jump from the window, yell at the top of his lungs, enter Sonny. But he didn't dare ask. How did it work, who decided? His lover opened the wrapper and took out Will's underwear. The feel of Sonny's hand coating his dick was electrifying. He could make him feel cared for in any circumstances... Now it was his turn and he gathered all the memory of Sonny saying he admired him and saying he was brave. He followed Sonny's hushed demanding instructions and appreciated being led into pleasing him. There were noises. And muscles trembling. And something new in his eyes. A trust so profound, Will took the plunge. Sonny felt incredible around him, warm and tight and moaning. Will tried to keep calm and actually last. He pushed back and forth, thoughts dissolving with the new overwhelming sensations. “Sonny...” “Mmmm...” “I'm coming.” “Yes, yes, come! And please, look at me all through it. Don't hold on.” Will's face contorted and sweat came out on his whole body. He spasmed into an oblivion that had someone else in it. And it was incredible.


	16. Anger

"Will, Will, are you OK?" Sonny was shaking him gently. Will's eyes focused out of the cotton-like state he was in. He felt exhausted and his shoulder hurt. They had fallen asleep on the sofa. Sonny sounded very worried and Will wondered why. "Whatsamatta?" Sonny sat on the couch, his legs sliding under Will's and hugged him tight "You yelled..." "I did?" Will frowned. He didn't remember dreaming or... well anything really. "Sorry, I didn't... I guess it was another nightmare. It's been a while since I had one of those. Maybe it's the shoulder. I can feel it more." The worry in Sonny's eyes turned into agitation. He patted around him, looking for his jeans in the heap of discarded clothes. "We should take you to the hospital. I don't think it's normal and your forehead is hot and..." Will tried to sit too. He couldn't control his neck and his vision became blurry. He put his hand under his chin and winced when he felt a pinch. "Don't panic, Son. Let me drink first. Maybe I'm just super tired. I did overexert myself yesterday, after all" he added with what could pass for a smile. Sonny didn't laugh "You think, that's why. Oh god, we shouldn't have..." "No! I mean, yes... I'm 18 Sonny, I hope I can make love and not..." He didn't finish his sentence. Sonny came back with a glass and the water was an immense relief. Will looked at his lover and decided to take care of his moral well-being "Will you feel better if we leave for the hospital now?" Sonny nodded. Will gave in. He fell asleep in the car, shivering.  
  
"It's an infection. You'll have to stay until we've made sure it's finished. In fact I'd like to X-ray you." Will looked at Melanie's father with apprehension. He trusted him. The man's personal life was a train-wreck but he was a fantastic doctor. "Can Sonny stay with me?" Daniel smiled "Of course, but he can't go in the X-ray machine though. Maybe you should take the opportunity to take a coffee. This is going to be long." Will struggled. He turned to Sonny, whose hand was fused into his and whispered "You don't have to stay through all of it. I mean, you need your sleep..." Sonny's brow went comically up and Will smiled. The meds were already making him better. "You think I'll get any? Seriously? It's my fault you're here." "Sonny, we've already discussed this. What happened yesterday was..." Sonny cut him and the desperation in his voice hurt Will more than his wound "No, I mean... It's my fault you got shot. He was only after me. He even said it." Will opened his mouth then closed it. It felt like a reassurance wouldn't be enough. What could he say to take the guilt off? A nurse came to take samples and Will murmured "Then, can you stay all the way through? That way, I'll feel confident and strong." Sonny kissed his hand "Yeah, I can do that. I love you." The shock made Will take a deep breath and he didn't notice that a syringe had been plunged in his arm and was filling with blood. All he could see was Sonny. All he could feel were his fingers on him. All he could hear was that word, over an over and he stayed gaping until the nurse asked him for a urine sample. He walked to the bathroom and sat on the lid. First he needed to collect his thoughts. The fever was returning and he felt weak and emotional. The tears were cascading his face but he didn't care for that. Could he say it back? Was he sure? Was Sonny sure? Maybe it just escaped him...  
  
He finally came back and handed the nurse the container. She left and Will stayed upright, hand on the chair next to the bed, looking into Sonny's eyes, thinking and feeling. Sonny didn't look guilty anymore, more... assured. Will hold a shaky hand and placed it on Sonny's heart. Sonny immediately grabbed it. Will focused on enunciating correctly and not stammering. The fire in his body was getting worse but now was the right time " Sonny... I love you too. So much." And he fell into his boyfriend's arm just as Daniel reentered the room. He heard "He's burning up Daniel. What's going on? Please, make him all right again. Please..."  
  
Daniel put the X-ray in the file "OK, there seems to be a tiny piece of the bullet lodged in your arm so I'll have to operate on you. I can do it tomorrow afternoon. Until then, you stay in our care. Sonny, you can go home and rest, if you want." Will didn't have to look at Sonny to know he was giving Daniel a no-way-in-hell look. He fell asleep soon after.  
  
In the morning, he felt much better. He wasn't allowed to eat so Sonny went to the cafeteria for his own breakfast. When he came back, Will asked "Son, where did you sleep?" Sonny grimaced. He whispered "Not important." "It is to me..." "On the chair. I put my head on your pillow. I tried very hard not to touch you. I hope you still slept well." Will didn't know where to begin. He tapped the bed and Sonny sat next to his knees. "I love you Son. Thank you for being there. I really needed this. But during the surgery you can go home and have some rest." "Are you kidding?" "No" Will was serious as hell. This was important too. "I don't want you to be unwell. It won't serve any purpose. You have to take care of yourself. For me." Sonny nodded and said "I will. Because I love you."  
  
The surgery began later than expected and Will called Sonny on the white telephone he had in his hospital room. He hadn't used one of those in ages "Hi, did you get some sleep?" "Yeah, slept like a log. Are you already out of surgery?" "No, it's been reported till 6pm. So you can wait and I'll tell them to call you." "OK. Oh, Will!" "Yes?" "I found a photo near my bed. Where did you get it? Was it Martin who sent it?" "No... I wanted... I forgot to tell you... Can this wait until tomorrow?" "Sure".  
  
He opened his eyes. One minute before he had drifted into unconsciousness and now he was regaining his senses. His shoulder felt different. He patted his arm. So, the operation had taken place. He had lost two hours of his life. Like they never happened. He looked around him. He didn't know this room. There were other metallic bed on wheels like the one he was lying on. He called but his voice wasn't back and he only heard himself croak. He put his head back and waited. A nurse was bound to come by and check on him. Sonny's image suddenly filled his mind and he replayed his love declarations. It felt perfect and genuine and... There was the sound of a door opening. He lifted his hand a few inches to wave. But the person wasn't in scrubs. And he knew the face. Bernardi.  
  
So, he was dreaming. Or nightmaring rather. Maybe he was still in surgery. Which meant he couldn't wake up. He saw a knife descending on him and it struck him as odd. He had never pictured him with anything else than a gun. In an awfully cold moment, he realized this was reality. He was going to die after all these efforts to stay alive. And with Sonny loving him and... From the depth of his being, a mighty feeling developed. It wasn't fear, nor panic. His hand grasped the ex-cop's wrist, stopping his movement "Looks like you're fighting back, Will. I wanted to do this discreetly but, hey! I'll still make sure you can't witness against me." Will hissed "I don't need to... They have other proofs." Bernardi smiled "I've taken care of that. I still have friends in the profession. There are ways to taint the chain of evidence. I'm not worried." Will pushed on his elbow and answered "You should. Because, this time, I'm not fleeing." Bernardi unhooked Will's fingers and put the knife to his throat "You can't. Bye, Will."


	17. Combative

Will was fighting two enemies at once : Bernardi and the anesthetic. He hated feeling himself so weak and focused on Sonny's image to manage. He didn't want him to cry again, propped over him, this time with Will being really dead. His knee jerked up, pushing into the man's belly. There was a grunt and the knife fell down, hitting the ground into a repeating metallic sound that hurt Will's over-sensitive ears. His head was pounding and he didn't see well. Bernardi had switched the lights off. Will slid to the edge of the metallic bed and fell over. The shock actually helped waking him and he looked for the silhouette, wondering if Bernardi had left. He realized he didn't want him to. He wanted him arrested again and this time, he would testify. And be believed. The killer jumped on him, trying to knock him out. They struggled wordlessly until Bernardi grabbed Will's new bandage "F...!" Will kept fighting for a few seconds then it struck him that his voice was back. He started shouting to the point of hurting his lungs "Helllllp! Securi..." A hand was pressed hard on his mouth while the other one got them even by punching him in the gut. Will's skull hurt the wall and he punched back, directly in the man's head. Bernardi fell but quickly got up and with the knife again. Will squirmed and scratched "Won't... Won't you stop fighting, you little weasel!" Bernardi whispered, panting. "I won't, no! You killed a good man, you'll pay for that!" "I should have killed you too... But you hid like a coward." Will hissed "I'm not hiding now, you should have brought a gun because I'm not letting myself be sliced up like a pig..." He brought his face next to Bernardi and looked straight in his demented eyes, stating "I'll end you if I must." Then he shouted "Isn't there anyone here?" The door was banged as an answer and the lights were switched on, blinding the both of them. There was a loud commotion and Bernardi was taken away from him while a voice yelled "Sir, stay where you are, this man is armed!" Sonny yelled back "Will, Will, are you OK?" Will pushed past the security guards taming down Bernardi and threw himself in Sonny's welcoming arms. The sweetness invaded him, erasing all the violence like a brush on a slate. The adrenaline pitch ended its course and his legs gave way. He didn't touch the ground, though, Sonny held him up and nurses came to take care of him. The last word he heard as he was swept away were "I'm not listening to you anymore, Will. I'm staying at your side, always!"  
  
And he did. No one could pull him away and no one tried too hard, given what has happened. He barged in the hospital room Will had been brought in and Dan gestured the nurse to let him sit. Will lost his right hand into a firm unmovable Sonny grip and smiled smugly. They locked eyes during all the medical examination, mouthing 'I love you' and sending air kisses. Sonny stayed while Will slept his exhaustion off, he stayed the day that followed. They recreated that little cocoon they had woven at the cabin, a world just for them where not even the clanging noises and the buzzing of the machines could bother them.  
  
His mother came and check him out. She was happy to see him looking better but he noticed a lingering sadness in her eyes. He took advantage of Sonny being away for a moment to ask her "Why do you looks so down, mom? Has something happened?" Sami shook her head then whispered " EJ has confessed to what he did. How he's the reason Nick found you..." "What!" Sonny's voice was shattered. Will turned too late and didn't manage to hold him back "Sonny, wait!" Sami looked crestfallen "Oh my god, what shall we do?" Will grabbed her car keys from her limp fingers and rushed outside, leaving her behind. Sonny was starting his car and Will had to hurry to follow him although he had an idea where he was headed. He had had the same reaction, though he was less angry at the time. No one answered the door to the DeMira mansion when he got there but his constant knocking finally brought up a butler. He didn't waste time "My boyfriend must be here already and I'm afraid things will turn ugly between him and EJ. I need to see them now, please?" The domestic hesitated but he showed him the way nevertheless.  
  
Sonny wasn't physically attacking EJ but it was a technicality. They were staring at each other and although EJ looked a little guilty, he wasn't backing down. Will said sweetly "Son...?" No reaction. Sonny growled "We were safe... Will was healing and because of you..." He took a small step forward and Will thought very fast. "So," He shouted "Is that how you stay by my side? I thought you were looking after me!" That worked. Sonny turned around. "Will..." He pleaded. Will came and took his hand. "The violence has to stop, Sonny." He addressed EJ "Mom said you told her everything." EJ nodded "I did. I also said I would leave her alone. I have proved that I'm too egoist. I'm sorry for what happened. I really am." "Sorry? If you're sorry why don't you help us then?" asked a belligerent Sonny "Without hesitation... What do you need?" Sonny turned to Will who whispered "Help us fight Bernardy. Legally. He said he still had friends in the force. I'll have to testify against him. If you could find who those guys are and expose them, I'd have a chance of having Rafe's murderer committed." EJ sat at his desk and took his phone "Consider it done." Will thanked him and dragged Sonny outside. When they got to his car, he looked pulled out of a dream "Where's your mom?" "At the hospital. I took her car to follow you." Sonny bit his lower lip. "I'm sorry, Will, I disappointed you. I'm no better than him." Will laughed loud. The relief flooded his veins. He hugged Sonny and whispered "I reacted the same way when I found out. That's how I got the photo of us at the cabin, you know? I postponed telling you because I was a coward..." Sonny froze "Will, stop saying that word." Will nodded "I will. I faced my biggest fear with Bernardi and I stood against him until the end. I found my strength and now I feel stronger. And that's all you. You gave me that. So you're allowed to f... up from times to times, you'll still be my hero." Sonny opened the car door and helped Will in. He said "See you at your home. I love you." "I love you."  
  
A few hours later, Sonny came into the apartment holding roses. He stopped in front of Sami and handed her one "This is for you, to show my support for your hard times. I haven't met Rafe but I'm sure he was a great man." Sami smiled and brushed a tear "He was. Thank you." Then he gave each kid a flower and said "This is for being great children. I hope we'll play together and get to know each other better. I love your brother very much. I hope you'll welcome me in your family." Allie kissed him on the cheek "I'm glad you are our new brother." Will who had his back on a wall and was watching from a distance almost lost it now and then. He gulped and waited stoically. Sonny came to him and handed him the last rose "I know we haven't known each other long but I want you to know I plan and be with you for a long while. You're OK with that?" Will took the rose and put a hand on Sonny's arm "I think I don't have a choice. You're keeping me alive, in every sense of the term."


	18. Serenity

Will hit his finger on a nail and swore. Two curious heads popped out at the window while he sat on the porch and sucked the blood. He waved the cats away but they just wriggled their way to him and Berry jumped on his lap, purring her comfort. Will fondled the affectionate feline with his other hand. The cat was bumping her approbation with her nose when Sonny appeared in the doorway. He knelt down and took Will's injured hand to examine it "You're bleeding, honey. Off to the bathroom." "It's nothing, Sonny, really..." He didn't press it. Him bleeding was a sensitive thing for his boyfriend and so he followed him and let himself be pampered. There was something very sensual in the way Sonny was touching him anyway. It was like Will's body wasn't his own anymore. And Sonny took great care of it and of him. Will didn't wait for him to put the band-aid. He pulled the front of Sonny's T-shirt and kissed him. Sonny let him, then proceeded with the caring. They went back to the door frame and installed the new one made of red wood. They hadn't touched the rest of the cabin except for the branches on the roof which weren't necessary now. Sonny took Friday in his arms and put him in the armchair. Berry joined her son and they cuddled against each other into a furry white and brown pillow that you had better not sit on, ever. Sonny petted them a little then turned and walked to the curtain "Want to go for a walk?"  
  
They walked lazily, stopping at almost every tree. To kiss. Or look at the summer sun rays playing on the surface of the waters. Or argue about which spot would be better to rebuild the deck so that they could, one day, tie the boat they were going to have, one day. Or just keep holding hand, standing, looking into each other's eyes for a while. The air was really cool after such a warm day and when they reached the cabin again, Will was shivering. Sonny noticed of course and wrapped his arm around him and rubbed his back a few times. Will went into the bedroom to hunt for a sweater. When he came back, Sonny was starting the fire, pushing his kitten away again and again "No, you don't, you'll get burned. Shoo! Will, can you help me there?" "Well, I don't know" Will answered deadbeat pan. "It's your cat, you said and only yours. So the authority must come from you." Sonny got up and carried the cat in the bedroom, then closed the door "Yeah, as if cats answered to authority..." "You mean the way you do?" Sonny shook his head. Soon the fire was burning bright and Will felt his skin tickle. He sat on the edge of the armchair and relaxed. He felt lips pressing on the back of his neck and bent his head to give better access. Being here again was raising lots of memories and one of them was this decision he had made at the time of letting Sonny come into him. Which had never happened as Sonny always begged for him instead and Will couldn't say no. So, this time he whispered "Sonny...?" "Yes?" "Tonight I want you..." "Only tonight?" Will smiled and replied "I meant, I want you in me. Would you...?" He felt the hesitation inside the continuous kissing of his skin. He had to ask but carefully "I really want to try, you know, I'm ready. We've had sex for months." Sonny sighed and sat in the armchair, pulling Will to sat on his lap in a way that their crotches were in contact. Will moaned. Sonny looked even more unsure. Suddenly it dawned on Will. He asked gently "You've never topped, have you?" Sonny looked so miserable, Will felt vulnerable too. He took Sonny's pinkie and nipped it "Well, I remember my first time pretty well and as far as I remember and hope, you liked it. Are you afraid you'll disappoint me?" Sonny shrugged "I don't know. It's just... harder to take the plunge now. But if you really want it..." Will slowly nodded and put his chin in the crook of his boyfriend's neck "I really really do. Not because I expect a lot but because I love you. Can I confess something?" "Sure" Sonny's voice was puzzled. Will looked into Sonny's trembling eyes and breathed out "When we were still in hiding and we pleased each other, I thought that for Christmas, I would... offer myself to you. So that you'd feel a little better..." Sonny kissed him instantly. His mouth was soft and swollen and his arms tightened around him. Will felt he was sliding down onto the new wool carpet and watched with delight Sonny getting out of his clothes like he had a train to catch. He didn't move a muscle and let himself be stripped down, wanting Sonny to take the lead from beginning to end.  
  
Will whimpered under the caress of the fire heat and of Sonny's deft fingers. He was panting heavily, getting used to the new feelings and slight hurt. Sonny had lost his confused air and just looked in heaven. Will once again marveled of doing that to him. He let the volume of his sounds go up. Being far from everything and everyone but being deeply united at the same time was a feeling he couldn't get enough.  
  
The next morning, his cell rang. It was Lucas' number but he heard Allie ask "Hey, Will, are you OK? How is the cabin?" "Great! We've fixed the door and changed the curtains and all. I can't wait for you to visit." "Me too! Dad says we'll be there in two weeks!" Will pictured his urban dad taking a look at all this countryside and then getting fed up quickly. He was only taking Allie anyway. She was bringing a small tent and couldn't wait to use it for the first time. Will asked "How is Bumpy doing ?" (That was such a dumb name to give to a cat... But neither Will nor Sonny had a say in it, so...) "She's great! But she eats a lot. I have to hide her food or she tries and tear the parcel open." They laughed and Sonny walked out of the bathroom and sat back on the bed "It's Allie, Son." Sonny grabbed the phone "Oh, hey, sweetie, how is Friday's sister doing?" Will got up and walked to the front door, to smell the fresh air and jumped and shrieked. Sonny ran and looked around stupidly "What's the matter baby?" Will put a hand on his chest to calm his heartbeats and stuttered "Looks like... The cats have been busy last night." "Hey! Those are big rats! Cats might do whatever they want but they are useful." Will nodded but still walked back to the bathroom. He heard Sonny say "Yes, you've been a big boy, you've killed the bad mouse... Yes, I love you..." "I heard that and I'm very jealous!" "Well catch a rodent then, there's plenty around! Although if you carry it in your mouth too, I might stop kissing it for a very long time."  
  
 That evening, Will went to bed early. He had a sunburn and was feeling a little dizzy. Sonny had put so much cream on his neck the sheets were soaked. He didn't feel like sleeping right away and turned and rummaged into the night table for his sketchbook. It wasn't there but behind a drawer there was a notebook. He took it out, wondering if it belonged to the owner. He opened it in the middle and saw his name. He quickly shut it and called "Sonny, can you come one minute?" Sonny entered the bedroom, looking dark and sexy and Will innerly blasted at his burning neck. "What is it?" Will handed him the notebook and Sonny sat next to him, leafing through the pages, smiling. "Yeah, I guess Martin didn't find it." "Is it a diary?" "Sort of. A way to keep sane. I stopped writing it after a while and I kind of forgot about it. You've read it?" Will brushed Sonny's arm and answered "I only saw my name. I didn't know it was yours and I didn't want to intrude." Sonny smiled tenderly and opened it again. He flattened the page and put it in front of Will 'Yesterday, this guy arrived. He's Nick's relative. But Dad wrote I can trust him entirely. And he's witnessed a murder. He looks horribly shocked. I don't know if I can trust him though. He's so beautiful, I feel there's a trap in there.' Then a few pages were flipped and it read 'Should I tell Will what I'm feeling? He's so young and vulnerable. He already gives so much. Maybe at Christmas I'll say I like him a lot. It can be understood two ways and he'll pick one. I wish I had an idea for a present for him." Will felt his heart getting larger reading this. Sonny had feelings for him at the time. That felt so good. He stared into his brown warm eyes and grinned "I had no idea." "When did you start having feelings for me, then?" Will thought a little "I realized I had them in the car to the aerodrome with Martin. I can't say when they changed. I always thought you were gorgeous too..." They kissed a long while then Sonny took Will's hands in it and muttered, head bent "Also, I wanted to say... After we come back, we could find a place together... I mean, I have lived with you already, you're OK..." Will laughed and whispered "Sure. I'd love to." "But you know if we get married one day, I mean, as it's legal here and all... We could have the party here with tents and stuff..." Will looked for his breathing inside his chest and focused on bringing it back "Are you asking me...?" "Well, not for now, in a few years maybe?" Berry ran out of the room she had just entered at the loudness of Will's response. She took Friday outside through the new cat trap and let her human friends do their things.


	19. Love

(...) _We'll meet in front of the building at 10:30am.(...)Directions to the cabin : from Seattle, take the road 90(...) If you reach Moscow, you've gone too far east, and we couldn't get married here anyway (Idaho doesn't allow same-sex marriage yet!). (…) (...)Think to bring a tent and sleeping bags, it can be cold in the night.(...)Thank you so much for your presence. We realize it is far and we appreciate our friends and family presence._  
  
Will walked out of the hotel escorted by his cousin JJ and his (not so little now) brother Johnny. Almost everyone had arrived the day before, although they were still waiting for Lucas who was being picked up and brought from the airport. Will hoped the flight wouldn't be delayed. The idea of his father bringing him in front of the judge was something he was looking forward to. It was a light walk to the court house and they took in the summer light on the treetops as they walked along the bay. The tall buildings around were imposing and although Will had been excited to visit Seattle, he was also in a hurry to be back into the quiet atmosphere he had bathed into for the past two weeks. They had driven there the moment he got his college diploma, not celebrating it as it was too near the wedding itself. It was still an important moment because they had chosen to wait for his studying to be over to have the ceremony. He spotted Allie first, looking all composed and lovely-looking. Soon, she was going to be a teenager. One day, Will would attend her own wedding. She was talking with Abby, the other maid of honor, Sonny's as it happened. They had settled for two best men and one maid each. Tyler would have thrown a fit if he wasn't one of them, so Will had asked if he would like to wear a nice pink dress. Tyler had waited for the laughs to subside, then asked for the exact date, adding he preferred tuxedos. Will was happy to see him waiting for him. He had the rings.  
  
The court house was mainly a façade made of windows. Will got hugged and kissed but he couldn't see Sonny anywhere and felt a little anxious. Then a taxi door opened and EJ, Sami's new husband, helped Lucas, her ex-one, get out of the car. Will felt a little better and greeted his father. They saw Chad walk to his fiancée and explain something then he went back in. Abby called them "Allie and I must go inside before you, Will. Then you can come too, with the other guests." Will was amused by all the fussing. It was a civil ceremony and it wouldn't last long. But he played along and he walked in, followed by his chatty relatives. Sonny was standing there, a splendid grin on his face and Will forgot everything else. This was it. Tyler, Allie and Johnny went to the right, creating an unevenly heighted mirroring of Chad, Abby and Alex, Sonny's brother. Will felt his heart has reached his limit. There was no more room for anyone or anything else. He had a thought for his grandma Caroline who had been unable to do the trip, due to her decaying condition. They had promised to send her plenty photos. He didn't have to remember to smile for those, though. The first part of the wedding was over now and they went down the stairs, being covered in rice, caressing each other's mouth with their eyes. Will had already kissed Sonny in the marriage room but stole a new one just before they entered Martin's jeep. EJ and Victor had offered sumptuous limousines but the boys had laughed them off. Just picturing the long-nosed black cars screeching their way though the dusty forest path was enough for a hilarious session and Will had put that down into a drawing. The catering service itself was going to use SUVs just to get there, albeit, not for as long a drive, as they could come from Martin's town. He had insisted on being present at the court and Will had spotted the baseball cap and waved happily. Now, they were chatting for the long drive while the other guests went into the rental cars or their own and focused on not getting lost.  
  
There was no elaborate settings at the cabin. The nature provided the decor on its own in all his summery splendor. There was a wooden platform in a clearing a few hundred feet away from the lake, that Will and Sonny had built two days ago after they got a letter from Chad and Abby. They hoped their guest would not be too weirded out by the absence of cellphone signals. They loved it, it made their vacationing less stressing. They had more time to pet their cats and swim in the lake.  
  
After the tents had been installed all around and EJ had grumbled about having to live like a hippie and Sami whispering something in his ear that calmed him, and JJ had been expelled of Johnny's and his shared tent for reasons not explained, and Sonny's nephews had started unpitching three tents until they were spotted by their grandmother, Adrienne, and Allie had tried kidnapping Friday and Berry to replace Bumpy who had to stay in Salem, and the cats had almost destroyed her tent... and the calm Will was aspiring to seemed like an impossibility, even in their haven of peace... After Champaign had been popped and the delicious meal finished and the catering crew had taken the plastic chairs with them... After all, that, Chad climbed on the platform and shouted louder than everyone and got them to lay on the blankets scattered all around. It looked a little like an indie concert and Will smiled at the 'star' at the front, thinking with delight he looked a lot better. Chad had fought his cancer well but the skeleton-looking days weren't that far. Abby was looking at him with a radiant grin, so radiant that Will expected her to steal their thunder before the end of the day with an announcement of sorts. He put his hand in Sonny's, remembering their endless debate over adoption and surrogates and realized suddenly that they had just taken a huge step in that direction by binding their fate officially.  
  
"So, here we are all where it all began, this great love that we're celebrating today, where they met in, let's just say, quite stressful circumstances..." Will glanced at his mother and caught her melancholic stare. Another guest was missing and Will wondered if Rafe would have liked Sonny. Chad was going on and soon had Abby join him. She took out big cardboard with stuff written on it and soon, Will had to sit opposite Sonny for a "Who's gonna do...?" where they had to put up either "He will" or "I will". He had to be quick, although his mistakes had the crowd laugh so... He felt light and connected to each and everyone there, part of an even bigger family than before, but mostly, he felt the "we will", which was the third over-sized card. They were stranger that first night and now, they were protecting the other one from anything life threw at them and he felt grateful. So, when the game was over, he jumped into Sonny's arms and kissed him fiercely, collecting loud yipees.  
  
Their parents all stepped up and said their pieces. Adrienne said "Will is a special soul. You know what he offered Sonny for their Christmas here? A beautiful drawing of Justin and me. I have it now and every evening, I am grateful their path met. I got my son back and another one." Sonny wiped Will's eyes for him and went to hug his mom. Justin said "Lucas took Will straight to me after the... When he was frightened for Will. Because he trusted me. And I trusted Will with my son's life and he proved worthy of it. Welcome to the Kiriakis family. Sonny said you'll use our name with yours and I'm happy you will. You're one of us now." Sami's speech was blurred and teary and Will didn't hear all as he was weeping too. Lucas stood up, looking ill-at-ease and told Sonny "Thanks for loving my son, Sonny. He's happy with you and that's what I dreamt for him since he came out. To find a real partner." He doesn't hug Sonny but shakes his hand awkwardly and Will knows it's perfectly OK. Then he stands up, just as the first stars begin to shine and calls Sonny to come next to him. It's hard to make a speech without a mike and he focuses on talking loud enough, even though his voice is shaking.  
  
"...Sonny, you've helped me through the hardest time of my life. You fell in love with me here, you proposed to me here. Now we're married and I can't help wonder if I'm gonna wake up, but when I do, it's always in your arms. And I plan on doing that for the rest of my mornings..."  
  
"Will, I don't even know where to start when I want to list all your qualities. Your compassion, your humor, your braveness..." He blinks and in the starry dark, only Will sees it and beams "but most of all how you always put the others first and I'm so lucky I'm in the first place. I'll do everything I can to keep the position..."  
  
When the informal part of the ceremony is over, as they walk to the cabin, EJ stops them with "By the way, I haven't given you a wedding present yet." Will frowned "Yes, you did. Mom put it next to the door, she even wrote 'From your mom and EJ' on it." "Yes, of course, but I though that I still owed you something for... you know..." Sonny sighed. He had never gotten over EJ's endangering them. He took the envelope and Will heard a strained "Thanks. Have a good night. Hope you brought a flashlight." "Oh, my god, no!" Will laughed and pulled Sonny to the cabin. They were on their own at least and didn't even make it to the bed. The new small couch welcomed their naked, tensed bodies and soon, Will had to remind himself he couldn't yell as much as usual with all their family around outside. So he took Sonny's mouth to use as a moan extinguisher and arched his back each time his husband's cock sent fireworks up his spine. Sonny had gotten really good at topping and Will had asked it for this special night. Sonny had agreed against a blowjob that had to be as good as the one he gave him on their first stay here. Will kept it for later as the night was young and managed and take Sonny to the bed. He grabbed their clothes and the envelope. They sat on the pillows, looking at each other amorously, then curiosity got the better of Will and he took the letter out.  
  
It said " _I talked with Mr McLeod. He sends you his best, by the way. Apparently, his grandson is not very much into nature and fishing so I asked him a favor. I know you want to be independent and buy your own place and I command you for that. But I'm offering you your vacation home. And the acre around it. I hope you'll accept my gift._ "  
  
Will looked at Sonny, who grazed his arm and whispered "OK I forgive him." Will laughed and proceeded to do his part of the bargain. Sonny said after that this was the best he ever gave him and they should get married more often. "We couldn't afford it... I'd rather spend the money on a loft. Did I mention the one I saw on the main avenue with the view on the Michigan?" "About a thousand times, honey. We'll visit it when we come back if it's still on the market I promise."  
  
Thant night, Will dreamt of a little hand holding his as they walked to the small boat, just next to the wooden deck.


End file.
